Mom to Faith Elizabeth

Born sleeping on September 28, 2011

Nashville, Tennessee

On Tuesday, September 27, at 1:30pm, my husband and I went in for our “big ultrasound,” also known as the anatomy scan, where all of the baby’s organs and growth/development are checked, and where we would find out if baby was aboy or a girl. I was 2o weeks 6 days pregnant. The tech began the scan, took a few measurements and pictures, and then said she “needed to get one more thing” and would be right back. I knew immediately that something was wrong. I sat up and looked at her screen and saw a blank spot under heart rate. It felt like she was gone forever and my husband tried to keep me calm, but then the nurse walked in and said, “The doctor will see you today.” Everything for the next few minutes is a bit of a blur, but I remember saying, “No, no,” my husband holding me, and the doctor coming in to tell me how sorry she was and explaining how we would proceed. I knew that I was too far along for a D&C and that I would actually have to deliver my baby. The doctor gave us the option of going home for a bit and then coming back to labor and delivery when we were ready, but that seemed pointless to me. I decided we needed to go to L&D now and get the process going, as horrible as it would be. [Read more…]


Mom to Eli Fred Lyman

Born Asleep September 20th, 2011

Payson, Utah

Our sweet baby boy passed away at 34 weeks gestation and was born asleep on Tuesday, September 20th, 2011.

Let me prefix this by telling you that from the beginning of this pregnancy, I knew he would be born early. I didn’t imagine it would be anything like this, but I knew. I was absolutely sure of it. Call it premonition or wishful thinking; call it what you want, but I knew.  I didn’t tell many people because the initial reactions I got were that of either ridicule or doubt. Not that people were rude, but they probably were thinking I was nuts so I stopped insisting. I simply figured I’d have him around 37/38 weeks and not have to be miserable the last couple.  [Read more…]

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