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Mom to Faith Elizabeth

December 27, 2010

Upstate, New York

Five years ago I became pregnant with my second child.  My husband and I were beyond excited to grow our family and to see our 3 year old daughter, Julianna become a big sister.

My pregnancy progressed as normal and I will never forget this date.  August 31, 2010 was the big day!  The day we were scheduled for our 20 week ultrasound and we would find out if our baby was a girl or a boy! This day forever changed the lives of myself, and my husband and daughter.

That day we learned that our unborn baby had a rare and fatal condition called anencephaly.  This happens early in the pregnancy and it’s a condition that causes the bones of the baby’s skull to never fully close, which exposes the brain.  Our baby had a severe case and was missing skull from the eyebrows upwards. [Read more…]


Mom to Maddox Ford

November 7, 2011 – December 26, 2011

Plainfield, Illinois

I found out I was pregnant with Maddox Ford May 20, 2011. It was a Friday and I was at work. I was so excited about being a mom and my family was, too…finally, grandkids! The first ultrasound and every doctor’s appointment I grew more and more anxious and fell more and more in love with my child I hadn’t even met yet. My pregnancy was easy, no morning sickness, no issues. I was a healthy 26-year old with a whole new world in front of me. I didn’t get any of the genetic tests done, or any of the other tests done, because I was a low risk pregnancy. Once the first trimester passed, I thought like everyone else thinks, I’m in the clear. It never really occurred to me that something might actually happen to my baby. [Read more…]


Mom to Gemma Grace

Born still August 14, 2012

Portland, Oregon

We tried for a year to have another child, and had two early losses that broke my heart and made me wonder if I would be able to get pregnant.

In February 2012, we had another positive pregnancy test, and began to hope a little. As things went on, my blood levels looked good, I got sick, and we were celebrating. I was sure this baby was a boy, because I felt so different than I had with my daughter. I was taking Lovenox and aspirin because of the previous losses, vitamins, and being generally as healthy and conscientious as possible. [Read more…]


Mom to Samuel Evan

Born and died April 14, 2012

North Mankato, Minnesota

After only a few months of trying, my husband and I found out we were pregnant with our first baby in September of 2011. We were overjoyed! We started preparing for him as soon as we knew he was there. We loved him so much and wanted him more than anything. [Read more…]


Mom to Kristiana

Born and died April 27, 2010

Lynn, Massachusettes

I found out I was pregnant in late August 2009 right after my 27th birthday. I thought it was the best birthday present anyone could ever give me. Being a mother was all I ever wanted. My pregnancy seemed normal until February 24, 2010. I was 27 weeks pregnant and went for what I thought was a routine ultrasound. I brought my Mother, Grandmother, Aunt, and my daughter’s Godmother to this appointment. The ultrasound tech asked my family to leave and told me a doctor would be in to see me. [Read more…]


Mom to “Gir” James Joshua Beaver, Jr.

Born at Rest on April 20th, 2010

Tulsa, Oklahoma

At the end of the summer of 2009 I had gone to my OB/GYN for a check up and to discuss why I didn’t have a regular cycle. My doctor diagnosed me with PCOS (Poly-Cystic Ovarian Disease) she told me my chances of ever getting pregnant without fertility treatments was slim to none. [Read more…]


Mom to Baby K

Stillborn at 22 weeks 2 days

September 15th, 2009

Seattle, Washington

I had my first son in June of 2007 and he was a happy, healthy boy.  My pregnancy was in most respects, a breeze and though the delivery had a few minor complications, everyone was no worse for the wear.  We really felt lucky that everything had gone so well.  When he was almost two we decided to start trying again.  It has never seemed to take very long for us to conceive and this time was no different.  Within a week of trying we had conceived.  I felt a difference in this pregnancy, fairly early on.  I may have been mildly nauseous with my first pregnancy, but I never vomited.  This time, I vomited easily and frequently.  Sometimes it was so violent; my husband would find me crying on the bathroom floor.  Nevertheless, my ultrasound at 8 weeks showed a little heartbeat and what I called our little “gummy bear.”  The doctor prescribed some medication for the vomiting and off I went.  Because we went out of town and soon after my doctor went out of town, we weren’t able to get my next ultrasound scheduled until my 21st week, but we were all convinced I was having a girl.  My mom said that was why I was so nauseous and why I carried the baby differently.  In my gut I knew it was a girl as well, but I also felt like something else was wrong.  I had hardly felt the baby move.  I convinced myself I was being paranoid and waited for the ultrasound. [Read more…]


Mom to Savannah Grace Filer

July 2nd, 1996 – July 2nd, 1996

In November of 1995, my husband Chris and I found out that we were going to have a baby. We were thrilled with the thought of being parents. On February 21, 1996, we had a routine sonogram. There was concern that day regarding the abnormal size of the baby. The doctors advised us to do a Level II sonogram with a high- risk doctor. We took their advice and had the sonogram on March 12th. That day the high-risk doctor told us that something wasn’t right. The baby was behind schedule and other warning signs were present. They discussed with us the possibility of a heart defect, chromosome abnormality, or some type of genetic disorder. They also discussed the possibility that the baby could die before birth. We were encouraged to do an amniocentesis. We decided against the amnio because of the slight possibility of a miscarriage. All we could do was wait. During this waiting period, we received many prayers, cards, and encouraging words from family and friends. We know that through the prayers of God’s people, we experienced peace at a level we had never known before. [Read more…]


Mom to Beatrix Elizabeth

December 13th, 2010

2:05 a.m. – 3:50 a.m.

Upstate New York

My name is Sarah, and my daughter, Beatrix Elizabeth was born on December 13, 2010. She lived for almost two hours after she was born, and was so very beautiful. I miss her so. [Read more…]




Mom to Audrina Kay Duke 

  Born on April 21 2011 Earned her Wings May 4, 2011

  Selma, North Carolina

My soon to be husband and I were so happy when we found out we were expecting a little bundle of joy! Unexpected.. VERY but that didn’t make us any less excited to become parents. We were so excited when we finally found out that our little bean was a very healthy baby girl! Words cannot express how you feel when they type out those three little words on a monitor “It’s a GIRL!” We right away started to buy everything in pink and purples! Our whole world unexpectedly changed just a few weeks later. I had changed doctor in the middle of my pregnancy. [Read more…]


Mom to Oliver James

June 14th, 2011

Poulsbo, WA

My husband and I found out we were expecting our fourth baby in the beginning of December 2010. We were so excited! I couldn’t wait to tell the kids.

[Read more…]


November baby

November 2, 2005

Faith Elisabeth

December 5, 2007

Westminster, Maryland


I always thought that baby loss was something that happened to other people.  No one in my family had suffered any type of pregnancy loss, so why would I have anything to worry about?

When our son was about a year old, my husband and I decided to try for another baby.  We conceived our firstborn easily and our second pregnancy wasn’t much different.  I got pregnant within 4 months of trying.  I went in for a dating ultrasound and I knew something was wrong when the technician said to me, “Oh!  You’re very early.  Are you about 6 weeks?”  I was 8 weeks pregnant. [Read more…]


Baby A
Miscarried at 8 weeks on March 4, 2010

Isaiah David
Labor induced at 22 weeks due to fatal birth defect

Blacklick, OH

This story begins on September 18, 2010 when I took a pregnancy test and it was positive! After the loss of our first pregnancy at 8 weeks, this was the healing we were looking for. We went to the doctor’s office just a couple weeks later (5 weeks pregnant) and saw our little grain of rice-sized baby on the ultrasound. The little heart was just beating away as strong as it could be. We went again for ultrasounds at 7 and 9 weeks. We breathed a small sigh of relief to have made it further along than we had with baby #1. We thought this was going to be the one! [Read more…]


Mom to Angel Garcia
Born and Passed on April 30th, 2010

On October 28th 2009 I took a home pregnancy test because I was a couple days late and knew pregnancy was highly possible.  I had my Mirena removed in July as Tim and I decided we would like to have another baby.  In November I had my first prenatal appointment and Tim and I were SHOCKED when the ultra-sound technician told us there were three heartbeats.  This was supposed to be number four, now we were learning it would be number five and six as well!

[Read more…]


Mom to Ryan James
September 17th, 2010
Fort Worth, Texas

March 25, 2010, there were two pink lines and then on another test the word “pregnant”. After taking 3 different tests, I allowed myself to be excited! My husband and I had struggled to get pregnant with our oldest child, so I was shocked to be pregnant within 3 months. The plan was for this pregnancy to complete our family of four.  [Read more…]

Mom to Judy Amena
Born Still December 22nd, 2010
Arlington, Virginia
I became pregnant with my first child in April, 2010. My husband and I were thrilled and the pregnancy was unbelievably easy for the first several months. All of my prenatal appointment went well and I never had morning sickness or any seriously bothersome symptoms. Like every new mother, I was very anxious to see my baby, and so I did an elective 3-d ultrasound around 18 weeks. We found out we were having a girl, and I was thrilled. However, the first tech left us for a very long time during the ultrasound and when she came back in she had her co-worker with her. The co-worker was acting very strangely with us, but neither said a word about what they saw as the continued the ultrasound. When my mother asked if the baby looked okay, she simply waved her hands back and forth and said “we don’t EVEN LOOK for that sort of thing”. Although I noticed that their behavior was very strange, I was so excited that ignored it completely.

[Read more…]

Mom to VernaAnn Gabrielle Johnson
Born November 10th, 2009 at 4:09 p.m.
Lived for 44 minutes
Mayville, North Dakota

My husband and I struggle with having babies, so when we found out we were pregnant, we were shocked and elated!

[Read more…]

Mom to Carleigh McKenna
Born Still March 28th, 2009
SW Ohio
This is the story of my precious daughter, Carleigh McKenna, who was diagnosed with anencephaly in utero on December 15, 2008 and born still on March 28, 2009.

Carleigh’s story actually begins before she was even conceived. It begins back when God was preparing me for her not long after her sister Kyndra’s birth on January 10, 2008. During this time I came across stories of families who had received a fatal prenatal diagnosis and chose to carry to term. I poured over these stories. I read more about their diagnoses. I just felt drawn to them. I would’ve told you then that nothing like that would ever happen to me. Stuff like that always happens to other people. Boy, was I wrong.
[Read more…]

Mom to Carli Hope
March 26, 2010
Pittsburgh, PA
My third, and my fiancée’s first; Carli was not planned, but she was excitedly wanted. I went on and on for weeks about how great it was going to be when we felt her kick, named her, brought her home, and so on. When my older girls would fight, I would smile and say “oh, I can’t wait till there are three of them.” When we crammed into the truck for a road trip to visit Ray’s family on Thanksgiving, I chattered excitedly about how fun it would be next year, trying to get three car seats in. I made plans. I allowed hopes and dreams to form. It never occurred to me that something could take all this away from me.

[Read more…]

Mom to Genesis
Stillborn on March 16th, 2007
Lost to Anencephaly
Los Angeles, CA

It was late 2006 and my husband and I had been married a little over 2 years and we finally decided it was time to start a family. We had no idea how long it would take to get pregnant but we thought that it would probably take a few months. To our surprise we got pregnant on the first try. I found out Thanksgiving Day 2006 that we were expecting our first bundle of joy! I was so shocked when I saw that positive pregnancy test that my hands were shaking and I remember glancing at myself in the bathroom mirror and my jaw was on the floor and I was pale as a ghost. But I was so incredibly happy.
We were so excited we just had to share with my family, who live next door, and they threw an instant party for us. My mom rushed to the store to get a cake before they closed. It read “Congratulations!” on it. She also brought home with her a little yellow bib with stars on it and it said “Daddy’s little star” on it. We had sparkling apple cider (of course!) with strawberries. We took photos of the celebration as well. It we the beginning of the best chapter of our lives.
As the weeks went on I was able to have two ultrasound visits with my little one and the doctor was able to print out some pictures for me. Pictures that I will treasure the rest of my life. I remember my mom came with me to my appointment, not only because I was nervous since I had no idea what to expect, but also because this was her first grandchild and she loved seeing the baby when she could. During the second ultrasound I remember my mom was so happy to see that little bean jumping around in there moving around its little arms and legs. She started to cry from the joy. That ultrasound video is burned in my brain to this day, I’ll never forget my baby waiving hello to me.
I was into the second trimester and was itching to buy stuff for the baby already. I went and bought all neutral colored baby clothes because we still didn’t know what gender the baby was. Though in my heart I felt it was a girl. Around 18 weeks the time came to do the AFP test. My husband told me I should decline the test since we were young (23 & 24) and there was no history of any illness or anything in either of our families. I knew he was right but something told me to do the test anyway. I went to the lab and they took my blood. As I was sitting in the waiting room I was feeling very confident that this was just going to be a routine testing and they were going to tell me everything was great just as they had so far through my pregnancy. The lady who took my blood was having a casual conversation with me:

[Read more…]

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