Mom to Leilani Ramirez

Born August 7th, 2011 at 7:40 a.m.

Died August 7th, 2011 at 8:15 a.m.

Mesa, Arizona

My husband and I started trying for our 3rd child together in December 2010. On our 6th wedding anniversary, April 6th 2011, we found out we were expecting. We broke the news to our 2 daughters and my stepson along with the rest of our family. Super excited to be pregnant and to bring the last addition to our family in December 2011. Cinco de Mayo was our first routine doctor’s appointment which included our first ultrasound. We took both girls to see the ultrasound and their new baby. The baby was perfect healthy and measuring right on track.

Friday, June 17th 2011 I was 15 weeks and could not wait for my 20 week ultrasound to find out the sex of the baby so I paid one of the 3D ultrasound places to tell me the gender. Stubborn little baby…..legs crossed the entire time. We were told to come back in a week for another look at no charge. Friday, June 24th 2011 and after an hour of pushing and jiggling the baby would not uncross their legs. We ended up waiting until our 20 week appointment.

Friday, July 28th 2011 I went in for my routine 20 week visit with my doctor. The babies heartbeat was fantastic and all my blood test came back perfect. Even the AFP test came back normal. I was handed my ultrasound slip and made my appointment for the following day.

I took the girls again to the ultrasound hoping we would find our what we were having. After all the measurements were taken the tech moved down to the bum and still….the legs were crossed. We then reviewed the final measurements and found that the baby was measuring 2-2 1/2 weeks small but not to be concerned. The tech excused herself to speak with the doctor. As she returned she let us know that the doctor had left for the day and my doctor would reach out to me on Monday.

Saturday, July 29th 2011 I received a voicemail from my doctor asking to call her back as soon as possible. The call came in Friday night and I did not receive it until Saturday afternoon. In my mind and in my heart I knew something was wrong but I wasn’t prepared for what she was about to tell me. My doctor told me she was sorry but the ultrasound results showed that our baby had Potter Syndrome. She wasn’t familiar with the diagnosis but knew that it was not compatible with life. She told me that she would be sending me to a specialist for a second opinion. My world came to a halt. The child I was carrying for 5 months was not going to live and longer than a couple hours after birth or even past labor. This couldn’t be happening to me.

Tuesday, August 2nd 2011 I was sent to a specialist who performed a level 2 ultrasound to determine the exact diagnosis. Our baby had multi-cystic kidney disease which resulted in a loss of amniotic fluid, underdeveloped lungs and a very small bladder. We were given 2 options. To induce labor immediately or carry full term and let nature take its course. My husband and I decided to induce labor knowing if we were to carry full term the baby would become very deformed due to the lack of amniotic fluid and room to grow. We were then sent to another specialist on Thursday where they confirmed our baby had no amniotic fluid left, had multi-cystic kidney disease which led to Potter Sequence.

Friday, August 5th 2011 I was admitted to begin the induction. After 34 hours of labor and a few pushes we welcomed our daughter, Leilani at 7:40am on Sunday, August 7th 2011. I delivered the placenta with the sac intact and her inside. She was with us for 35 minutes. She passed at 8:15am. She weighed 12.7 oz and was 10 inches long. She was perfect!

We had a beautiful service and burial for her on Friday, August 12th 2011 with family and close friends.

You always hear about this happening to other people but you never think it would be you. We questioned why we were chosen to go through this but it wasn’t going to help. I knew I needed to make the most out of this situation. Leilani was the most amazing blessing to our family. She filled our hearts with the most gentle love we could ever ask for. A love only us mother’s who have lost children know. This has been a life altering experience for me and I choose to make it the best experience.

Since Leilani’s arrival I have told my story to many people to raise awareness that the loss of a child happens more often than we realize. Until you are put in this situation you don’t know how to deal with it or communicate to others. I want people to know that losing a child whether it be from miscarriage to stillbirth to infant loss, these are our children. I recently spoke at a Labor and Delivery nursing training to help the nurses understand my needs as a mother. I find great pleasure in speaking with people and educating them of our situations.

Leilani budded on Earth to bloom in Heaven. She will forever be in my heart and I will see her again.

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