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Emily

Mom to Lena Beth

January 10, 2016

Grafton, MA

My husband and I were so happy to welcome our first son in June 2012.  He has brought much joy and laughter to our lives.  When it came time for trying for another baby, we considered a three year age difference, but we were in the process of moving and it didn’t feel right.  A year later the timing was right and I got pregnant right away in July 2015.  Three days after taking a positive pregnancy test, I started bleeding.  It was considered a chemical pregnancy since I was 4.5 weeks along, so I never needed a D&C and only had to get blood work to confirm I was actually pregnant and then not pregnant anymore.  I remember feeling angry about having blood work taken three times over the course of two weeks.  I knew for a fact I was not pregnant anymore but my doctor insisted on coming in for the third time.  I wanted it to be over and to just move on.  [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/03/8179.html

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Samantha

Mom to Austen Elizabeth

Louisville, Kentucky

November 11, 2015

My pregnancy was not perfect by any means  – but, I knew the whole time, it would be worth it in the end. Every time I complained about being tired, uncomfortable or how I didn’t have anything that fit, somebody was always there to remind me how it would all be worth it in the end.

My husband and I had been married for about a year and a half when we decided we would stop not trying to get pregnant. We had been through the rough first year of marriage, came through closer and happier and we decided that we’d let the universe take over and see what happened. My very first cycle, BAM, pregnant. And before I could even wrap my head around that, I started to bleed. I’m not sure you can even call that being pregnant, because the stick was barely dry before I began to miscarry.

We didn’t let that get us down, and the very next cycle, again, I peed on a stick and it was positive. I was in shock, to say the least. I had read so many stories about how it sometimes takes couples months of trying to conceive before it happens and with what had happened only the previous month, I was a little apprehensive, but thrilled at the same time.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/03/8172.html

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Ashley

Mom to Michael Jeremiah

February 13, 2016

Louisville, Kentucky

Dear Michael Jeremiah,

On October 30, 2015, Daddy and I found out we were 5 weeks pregnant with you. We were so surprised and excited! Your due date was July 3, 2016. We had family photos taken in November so we could make a special Christmas card announcing you! On December 14, 2015 we went to your 11 week ultrasound and got to see you for the first time. We loved listening to your strong heartbeat. Afterwards, we told our families about you and everyone was excited. We gave your grandparents Christmas ornaments announcing you and we let your brothers each hold an ultrasound picture. I will never forget your oldest brother’s love for you. When we told him we were pregnant, he jumped up and down and pumped his arms in the air saying “Yes! Yes! Yes!” Then he said “I hope it’s a GIRL!” I later told him I was pretty sure you would be a boy but he never believed me. Your oldest brother hugged and kissed my belly EVERY NIGHT before bed. He was so excited about you!

On January 5th, 2016 I went to your 14 week check up. The younger two of your older brothers were with me and we got to hear your heartbeat again. It was your second oldest brother’s 4th birthday so I thought that was a special treat for him. He liked to say “the baby is behind your pocket” because I often wore sweatshirts and had a big pocket over the lower part of my belly. I was craving lots of carbohydrates with you (some favorites were tortilla chips and potato skins). On January 16, 2015 I felt the tiny flutter of first movement. Daddy and I were on the way to Logan’s for dinner and I said to Daddy, “I feel the baby moving! I thought I felt the baby earlier today but wasn’t sure until now.” I will cherish the time I had with you growing inside me. As my belly grew and grew, I kept imagining who you would be. We had no idea we would have to say goodbye so soon.

On February 12, 2016 we went to your 19 week ultrasound, excited to find out what gender you were. But instead we found out you went to Heaven. We arrived at the hospital around 11:30 a.m. on February 13, 2016 to be induced. It was a cold day but it was beautiful and sunny with blue skies. Labor started around 3:30 p.m. and the nurses there were so kind to me. I asked for a half dose of IV pain medication around 5 p.m. and then another half dose at 6:30 p.m. The contractions were getting stronger and more painful but the IV medication took the edge off of them. I ate some yummy cherry popsicles and one of your aunts stopped by to bring Zaxby’s for dinner. I didn’t eat but did enjoy the Coke that your aunt gave me! After she left, I dozed off a little. Around 8:00 p.m. I was pretty sure you were coming and asked the nurses to check me. They insisted I still had a while but I knew from the pain that I didn’t! Then at 8:20 p.m., you were born.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/03/8169.html

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Amanda

Mom to Ivan Joaquin

March 2, 2014 – March 10, 2014

Port Lavaca, Texas

It was a Tuesday morning. I felt sick and I felt exhausted. I couldn’t sleep the night before because I had a weird feeling in my stomach. While I was at work, I asked my mom if she could get me some medicine from the store. I explained my symptoms to her and chalked it off as just getting a cold or the flu. Her first question was, “Well have you started your period?” So….. I thought back, and No!

Actually I was 5 days late! But, I had been known to have irregular periods so I didn’t think too much about it. Plus I take the pill, so there is no way that could be an option. So when I got home on my lunch break, there was a bag from the drugstore with Dayquil, cough drops and a pregnancy test. I thought, “Yeah right, there is no way, but she bought it so I will take it.” [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/03/8163.html

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Rose

Mother to Quail (July 2011),

Bluebird (March 2012),

Owlet (November 2012)

San Luis Obispo, CA

It was a bright spring morning. The sky was blue, the air was warm. My partner and I sat on our front porch. I read our horoscopes. That’s when it happened. He looked at me and said, “I want to have a baby with you.” And so our journey began… [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/03/8157.html

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Jennifer

Mom to Faith Elizabeth

December 27, 2010

Upstate, New York

Five years ago I became pregnant with my second child.  My husband and I were beyond excited to grow our family and to see our 3 year old daughter, Julianna become a big sister.

My pregnancy progressed as normal and I will never forget this date.  August 31, 2010 was the big day!  The day we were scheduled for our 20 week ultrasound and we would find out if our baby was a girl or a boy! This day forever changed the lives of myself, and my husband and daughter.

That day we learned that our unborn baby had a rare and fatal condition called anencephaly.  This happens early in the pregnancy and it’s a condition that causes the bones of the baby’s skull to never fully close, which exposes the brain.  Our baby had a severe case and was missing skull from the eyebrows upwards. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/03/8146.html

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Sarah

Mom to Rebecca Anne

September 4, 2015 – September 5, 2015

Millington, TN

My first pregnancy was textbook, perfect.  No morning sickness, no surprises.  I actually delivered a beautiful, healthy daughter on my due date.

When I got pregnant again, I expected more of the same.  I was so excited I began telling everyone as soon as I found out.  A few weeks later, I had a persistent lower backache one day at work.  I didn’t think much of it, but when I got home, I discovered that I was spotting.  I panicked and called my doctors office, but it was after hours so I wasn’t able to speak to anyone til the next day.  I spent that night completely terrified, researching miscarriage online.  No one I knew had had a miscarriage, or so I thought.  I went to the doctor the next day, still hoping everything was ok.  They performed an ultrasound and my worst fears were confirmed. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/03/8140.html

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Lindsay

Mom to Baby Cavagnaro

February 23, 2016

Cincinnati, Ohio

I’m writing this very soon after as a way to help me cope.  On Monday, January 18th, I left work early.  I was too tired to remain at my desk anymore and I could not understand it.  I had slept all weekend – about 14 hours per day – and had over 9 hours of sleep Sunday night to Monday morning (after a long nap Sunday afternoon) so I knew something was wrong for me to be this exhausted.  My work has their own clinic onsite so on Tuesday when I still felt exhausted, after another full night’s sleep and a four hour nap the day before, I scheduled an appointment.

I emailed my mother that I was afraid I was anemic.  I had been having a period, albeit a light one, for over two weeks and I thought this blood loss must be causing me to have at least situational anemia.  I went to my appointment on January 21st and the doctor explained it could be anemia or it could be a virus, but since I was a little sore on the right side of my stomach and bleeding we also needed to rule out a tubal pregnancy.  I peed in the cup with the full confidence of a woman who had been on birth control the majority of her adult life, and said birth control had worked. 

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/02/8132.html

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Mary Kate

Mom to Charlie Valor

October 29, 2015 – December 22, 2015

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

“A honeymoon baby!!!” My mom had the best reaction when we told her I was pregnant. It was May 2015, six weeks into the pregnancy. I was glowing and couldn’t hide it.  I remember looking in the mirror saying to myself, “You are a mother.”

I travel for my job, and over the next three months, I had two meetings in Europe and another meeting in Asia scheduled. I saw the OB and had my first ultrasound 2 days before I left for my business trip to Europe. At that 8 week ultrasound, we found that there was a vanishing twin. This saddened me, and it gave me my first taste of fear in my pregnancy.  I could have been Mommy to twins, and it scared me to think about how the surviving baby would be affected. At the eleven week ultrasound, I was reassured that the baby was ok, measuring on target. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/02/8117.html

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Liz

Mom to Lola

April 26, 2014 – April 29, 2014

Santa Cruz, California

“There’s two in there!”

The midwife’s words, spoken at my first trimester ultrasound in October 2013, came as a delightful surprise. Never in the world did I imagine I would give birth to twins! My husband Kenny and I were very excited. We had suffered a miscarriage just a few months earlier, so we took this news as a happy, karmic reward. Twins don’t run in either of our families, but as I soon found out, identical twins (which is what we were having), aren’t tied to genetics at all. They happen randomly–when the egg splits in two after being fertilized–and occur in about 1 in 300 to 400 pregnancies.

Twin pregnancies, and especially identical twin pregnancies in which just one placenta nourishes both babies, are considered high-risk. While I was fearful about having this label attached to me, I felt more at ease as my pregnancy progressed. Everything seemed to be going okay. I was being seen approximately every two weeks, by either my delivering OB, or by the consulting specialists affiliated with Lucille Packard Children’s Hospital—one of the best hospitals in the nation. (Although Lucile Packard is located in Palo Alto, an hour’s drive away from my home in Santa Cruz, they fortunately have a satellite office/diagnostic center here in Santa Cruz, so I didn’t have to drive too far for my appointments.) And, starting at about 30 weeks, I had twice-weekly non-stress tests at the hospital in town where I would be delivering (Dominican Hospital). I was scheduled to be induced at 37 weeks gestation–on May 1st, 2014. I wanted to at least try for a natural birth, even though I knew that many sets of twins are delivered via C-section. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/01/8111.html

Nicole

Nicole

Mom to Brady

Ontario, Canada

September 4, 2015 – Septemner 12, 2015

My husband and I were married in August of 2012.  It was a great day.  We got married after three years of dating.  We also took our time and decided to be just the two of us for a little over two years before starting to think about expanding our family.  We were lucky enough to get pregnant in December 2014.  Meaning our first little one was set to be born just after our three year anniversary and right around my birthday. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/01/8107.html

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April

Mom to Kristian

December 16, 2015

Rocky Point, New York

I am the face of stillbirth. I am April. I’m 23 years old and a mother of a beautiful daughter Areanna and my sleeping handsome son Kristian, who was too beautiful for earth.

Here is my story: Expecting for the second time was so exciting for my boyfriend and I; when we found out we were going to have a boy we couldn’t have been any happier. My pregnancy was well, no issues but one; my cervix was shortening so I was on bedrest. All my boyfriend would talk about was his son and how he couldn’t wait for his arrival. [There was] so much he wanted to teach him and tell him (since his father was never around) Then December 16, 2015 came the date for my scheduled c-section. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/01/8091.html

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Deb

Mom to Samuel

Born and Died on October 1, 2015

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

I married the most wonderful man and my best friend in September 2013. We decided we’d start trying to have a baby in January 2015, with the thought it may take awhile to get pregnant. I was so anxious and excited to get pregnant that I would take so many pregnancy tests. When I saw that first positive stick, I couldn’t believe it. Mark and I were supposed to take a vacation in Saint Martin in December 2015 and I remember telling him that I didn’t think we would be able to go. He said “why not”. That was when I showed him the positive test and said “Because I’m pregnant!” That was a happy moment.

I was so blessed not to have morning sickness or anything too severe. Smelling beer, charcoal grilling, and the dishwasher made me feel nauseous but that was nothing compared to some mamas. Mark swore we were having a girl because I craved sushi, couldn’t stand the smell of beer and charcoal grilling. Our plan was to not find out the sex of the baby. We all know that plans don’t really work out the way we intend though.

At 10 weeks, I bled. I bled a lot. I woke up early that morning and went downstairs to feed the cat and get some cereal. While downstairs, I felt something warm dripping down my legs which turned out to be blood. I thought I miscarried. I woke Mark and we laid in bed and prayed. I was so scared. I went in for an ultrasound that morning and I couldn’t believe my eyes. Our little squirming coil (as my husband liked to call the baby) was wiggling around and with a strong heartbeat. I was told I had Placenta Previa and was put on pelvic rest for 5 weeks. 

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/01/8101.html

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Shannon
Mom to Zoey Ann
December 17, 2015
Los Angeles, California 
It all started when I was 30 years old and I was living in Branson Missouri last year.  Hi,  my name is Shannon and last year I found out I was pregnant. I was scared and excited at the same time.  I always wanted a baby. I knew I would be a good mom even though the father was not involved.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/01/8095.html

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Jen

Mom to Rosalie Joy

November 5, 2015

West Lincoln, Ontario, Canada

On November 5, 2015, I had my baby girl. She was born at 39 weeks 3 days – beautiful, perfect in every way. She weighed 8lbs, 1oz. She was born at 1:05 am.

She died at 7:25am. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/01/8081.html

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Taylor

Mom to Bailey Marie

October 14, 2015 – October 15, 2015

Vacaville, California

March 8, 2015, the best day of my life. I found out I was pregnant. I took about 5 pregnancy tests to really make sure I was pregnant and once I realized I was and that there’s no way 5 tests could be wrong, I looked in the mirror and said to myself “you’re going to be a mom,” and I began crying with excitement. It is what I have wanted for so long, a family of my own.

My boyfriend was out golfing so I went to the store and got a onesie and wrapped it along with the pregnancy tests for when he got home. Once he opened the perfectly wrapped package we both just smiled, the most genuine smiles we’ve both ever seen. Our lives were beginning now. The doctor appointments began. Always a strong heartbeat and they always told me it was a big baby. My gut was telling me it was a boy. We had a gender reveal party to find out the sex, IT WAS A GIRL! [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/12/8070.html

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April

Mom to Emery Rose

October 20, 2015-October 21, 2015

Whiteland, Indiana

In August 2014, I was diagnosed with diminished ovarian reserve and told that I likely would never be able to conceive a child again.  My husband and I accepted this and actually were not looking to have any more children.  At the time, we already had a boy 11 and a girl 4.  It was something we just took off of our radar and continued on.

In April of 2015, I discovered I was pregnant. We were shocked and nervous, but I was still so excited.  The day I found out I was pregnant I went in for blood work.  The very next day the doctor’s office called and said that I had very low progesterone.  I remember the nurse asking, “Are you bleeding, spotting or cramping?”  I told her no and that I actually felt fine.  She seemed quite surprised and said she would call in a prescription for progesterone and that I needed an ultrasound the same week.  The ultrasound confirmed what we already knew and they determined a due date of December 10, 2015.
[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/12/8067.html

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Mokgadi

Mom to Ethan Francis

December 3, 2015

Randburg, South Africa

It was a Sunday afternoon when my husband got me out of bed to go for a check-up; I was in bed since Thursday. I thought I was coming down with the flu so I decided to go see our GP. With all the symptoms I had, he suggested a urine test which came back positive for pregnancy. We were 6 weeks and 5 days. It was unexpected but we were very happy and made an appointment with our OBGYN to confirm.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/12/8060.html

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Elizabeth

Mom to Brielle Grace

October 2, 2015

Hartford, Connecticut

My husband and I were so excited, when I say excited, I mean literally over the moon! We are high school sweet hearts, we had traveled & had adventures, but something was definitely missing! That’s why when we found out I was pregnant on May 18th of 2015, we couldn’t have been happier. We had just started to see a fertility specialist because of a uterine abnormality (unicornuate uterus) and were surprised/thrilled/ecstatic really to be finally pregnant! We thought the hard part was over.
[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/12/8054.html

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Courtney

Mom to Baby B

February 26, 2014

Boston, MA

In early November 2013 my husband and I learned we were going to be first-time parents. Our first baby. Everything went smoothly until 19 weeks. We went to our 19 week anatomy scan excited. We were going to find out the sex of our baby! Make big plans! Our life was never going to be the same! Well, only the last thought was right. During the appointment my OB told us she had concerns, and that we would need to come back the next day to see a Maternal Fetal Specialist. The kidneys – something didn’t look right with the kidneys. Also, was I leaking amniotic fluid? No, I wasn’t. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/12/8048.html

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