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Yolandé

Mom to Ivy Kathryn

June 1, 2017

South Africa

I had visited my cousin’s for the weekend. I came back on the Monday. The Tuesday I noticed she wasn’t moving and told my midwife that I hadn’t felt her or rather can’t remember when last I felt her. I had started before then to do a kicking chart and did it that night also, as my midwife instructed. I did everything. Drank juice, lied down on my left side. I rested. I moved, tried to feel her, talked to her. Deep down I knew something was wrong. I made an appointment with my general practitioner who I’ve come to trust although I planned on doing water birth with a midwife.

My partner did not go in with me. I later saw messages on his phone that he told his mother that he was so stressed for the doctor’s appointment but that he chose to not go in with me and should it not be good news, he wouldn’t know how to deal with it. It’s these little details one never forgets. The image of her in my womb, dead. Lifeless, my body had failed me. How she felt when she died. Did she feel? These thoughts haunt me, daily. 

During my pregnancy, I was fairly stressed. The worry of another child, how we must prepare, how we must prepare our 16-month-old baby boy for his sister got to me and my relationship. Still, my partner stayed. I try to believe and accept that it wasn’t her time and that it is not my fault. Heaven needs her more.

I went into the doctor’s room. I started the consultation by asking the doctor for something for depression or something to calm my nerves and broke down, as I have always felt ashamed to ask for help, emotionally. As if this makes me a weaker person. He said [it was] no problem and then I mentioned that why I was actually there was because I couldn’t remember when I last felt her moving. It did not quite register that there was no heartbeat and that he was looking at my placenta and that there was a tear right there. I was waiting for him to tell me everything is fine, just take it easy and go home, start your anti-depressants. Ivy is fine.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2017/06/8496.html

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Mokgadi

Mom to Ethan Francis

December 3, 2015

Randburg, South Africa

It was a Sunday afternoon when my husband got me out of bed to go for a check-up; I was in bed since Thursday. I thought I was coming down with the flu so I decided to go see our GP. With all the symptoms I had, he suggested a urine test which came back positive for pregnancy. We were 6 weeks and 5 days. It was unexpected but we were very happy and made an appointment with our OBGYN to confirm.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/12/8060.html

SamieraSamiera

Mom to “Boy”

February 9, 2013

KwaZulu Natal, South Africa

My husband and I had been planning on having a baby since January 2012. After months of trying and trying, I found out through taking a blood test at my local GP that I was about three weeks pregnant in September 2012. My husband and I were overjoyed!!! From then on I took all the necessary precautions, vitamins, etc… At the eight week check-up, we got to see our baby for the first time, this little growing, developing embryo that had already given us so much of joy! It was an emotional experience and I’ll never forget that day.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7092.html

Abigail CupidoAbigail

Mother to stillborn twins, Zachary and Zoe

August 18, 2014

Cape Town, South Africa

Where do I start? So much emotion, anger, questions of “what ifs,” “whys,” etc. People will never understand the pain, sorrow and heartache that one feels losing both your babies. Not one, but TWO… a double blow!!! August 18, 2014 will be a permanent mark on our calender. This was the day we had to sadly deliver our twin prince and princess with no sign of life. For 4.5 years, we waited and prayed and this is what the end result was??? Why us and most, why me?

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7201.html

Kate

Mother of Sam Polley

October 23rd, 2010 – October 24th, 2010

Cape Town, South Africa

Saturday the 23rd October 2010 started as any other day. I set off to my much awaited baby shower that morning and friends marvelled as they felt both babies moving around. I left the baby shower and went home to collect the cribs to take back to my parents house. I had a rest and when I got up late afternoon, I felt very restless and uncomfortable. I lay on the couch for a bit, feeling frustrated, tired and like I had had enough! I decided to have a bath. As I got out of the bath, I had a really strong contraction which caused my whole stomach to tense. So much so that I couldn’t bend down and pick stuff up off the floor.  [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2011/09/3053.html

Carmen

Mom to Ryan

Born and Died on April 22nd, 2002 at 26 weeks

Allan

Born and Died on January 19th, 2003 at 23 weeks

and Ethan

Born at 32 weeks on May 10th and Died May 12th due to a heart defect


I am the mother of 3 angels and my last angel died 2 weeks ago.  My story starts 9 years ago when I had my first son Ryan.  When we found out I was pregnant, I was 3 months along and told our family at a restaurant where we had lunch, everyone was ecstatic to hear our news.  I can recall that it was a good pregnancy, no problems and all was going well until 18th April (Good Friday) evening at 11:50pm when I suddenly felt the urge to go to the toilet, which I did and to my horror, saw a thick mucus discharge with blood,  my husband took  me to the Medi-clinic emergency room immediately, where they admitted me as they suspected I was in labour, they put me on the monitor and had a look at my cervix which was not fully dilated yet.  All was going okay during the night and when the OB/GYN came early Saturday morning, she discovered that I was 7 cm dilated and immediately put me on meds to prevent the cervix from dilating further.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2011/06/2125.html

Chantal

Mom to Chloe, Lost 24+ weeks in September 2005

Second Loss at 21 weeks in October 2007

Third Loss at 13 weeks in March 2008

Fourth Loss at 21 weeks in April 2009

Fifth Loss at 12/13 weeks in July 2010

Sixth Loss at 9 weeks in 2010

Seventh Loss at 9 weeks in January 2011

Cape Town, South Africa

I found out I was pregnant for the first time in June 2005. I was nervous about telling my mom, because I was raised “first get married and then babies” lol. After I told my mom MY good news, it took her a while to get over it. Didn’t take her very long though, because the next thing you know she starts buying baby clothes. Me too, I just couldn’t resist the cute little outfits. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2011/04/1428.html

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