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Brittany

Mom to Aulbrey Lynn Myers and Two Other Angels

Born Sleeping on May 28, 2017, March 27, 2016 and December 26, 2016

Graham, North Carolina

After 2 early pregnancy losses within a few months, I became pregnant again with high hopes. In February 2017, my husband and I were so scared but blessed and so excited at the same time to finally have the luxury of being parents. At my first appointment, I was 6 weeks pregnant. I was so terrified waiting on the doctor to come in to do my ultrasound. After having such bad luck with my other 2 pregnancies (one chemical and one blighted ovum), I was so full of hope. [I was] praying continuously for a heartbeat. I saw the flicker before my doctor could even measure the baby’s heart beat. I began to cry with joy.

We were so happy. Her heartbeat was 109 bpm, strong and healthy! I went in routinely as this was a high risk pregnancy because of the recurrent losses I’ve suffered. Everything was perfect. At 7 weeks, my baby was able to move around (couldn’t feel her yet) but we could see it on the screen at every appointment; she was very active. No problems at all. She grew fast. I had severe morning sickness up until I was 12 weeks. I went in for my NT scan. She was wiggling everywhere. She wouldn’t sit still for the scan, lol. My perfect active baby! I was so happy, happier than I’d ever been. I also had bloodwork done to check the baby for genetic defects, down syndrome and to find out the gender. The scan came back at 14 weeks, negative for any defects and I was told we were expecting a healthy and happy BABY GIRL!!! I was over the moon excited. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2017/09/8530.html

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Chelsey 

Mother to Three Blessings

Grand Rapids, Michigan

Most people who know me know I’ve had a miscarriage. What they don’t know is I’ve actually had what some people call two “chemical pregnancies” and an eight week miscarriage. Call them what you like but to me they are all my pregnancies, my babies. My first two losses left me confused and lonely. I kept them to myself and buried them down where I thought I couldn’t feel them. I didn’t feel like I was allowed to mourn because they had been so early and the doctor had even classified them as “spontaneous abortions”. Even typing that phrase out makes my stomach turn. They were my babies and nothing less. But that’s what I did. I hid them and suffered in silence for every day after. My third loss broke me and I grieved them all all at once. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2017/07/8507.html

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Eileen

Mom to Paul Raymond and 6 Miscarried Babies

January 9 – 19, 2017
2009-2015

West Seneca, New York

My journey to becoming a mom started in October 2008. My husband and I were married for 2 years and he was just finishing college, so we thought we were in a good place to start a family. Little did we know, we were starting on an incredibly long and sometimes painful journey.

I got pregnant with our first right away. We were ecstatic and told everyone right away. Our first ultrasound showed a heartbeat and a little bean. I couldn’t believe I was finally going to be a mom, something I had dreamed about since I was a little girl. I was 34 years old and it was right before Christmas. But something was off; the baby was measuring a week and more behind. The doctor was sure my dates were off, but since I had been planning and following everything so closely, I knew my dates were right. However, I was naïve enough not to realize there was a big problem. The following February, I started bleeding and we found, at 12 weeks, that the baby no longer had a heartbeat. And so began our journey of struggling to become parents. I lost another baby at 7 weeks that June, the day after seeing a heartbeat. That baby, too, was measuring way behind.

It took an entire year for me to get pregnant again. I had gone to a reproductive endocrinologist who diagnosed me with a clotting disorder (elevated PAI-1) and told me the next time I got pregnant, that I’d be put on heparin. After multiple rounds on Femara, I finally fell pregnant in July 2010 with our beautiful, healthy daughter, who was born in March 2011. After my daughter was born, I was content to be one and done. My husband wanted a second child, but I was worried we were pushing our luck. I was getting older, my mother had had multiple losses, including a stillbirth, and I just didn’t want to take a chance. Once my daughter turned 3 though, I changed my mind, and was ready to try again. What followed were four miscarriages (2 early, 2 mid-to-end first trimester) over two years and then finally, a rainbow, in May of 2016.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2017/04/8444.html

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Rose

Mother to Quail (July 2011),

Bluebird (March 2012),

Owlet (November 2012)

San Luis Obispo, CA

It was a bright spring morning. The sky was blue, the air was warm. My partner and I sat on our front porch. I read our horoscopes. That’s when it happened. He looked at me and said, “I want to have a baby with you.” And so our journey began… [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/03/8157.html

Melissa FOL

Melissa

Mom to Six Angels

April 1997, December 1997, August 2000, March 2001, November 2001, April 2003

Pennsylvania

My name is Melissa and I have six beautiful angels in Heaven. I never dreamed I would suffer so much heartache. When you suffer a miscarriage during your first pregnancy you hear, “It’s common, try again. It just wasn’t meant to be.” You really don’t think much about it. Yes, it was heartbreaking but knowing it was so common, I still felt positive and hopeful. Then when I got pregnant a second time and miscarried again, we were told we could send it off for testing to see if there was a reason. So we did. When we received the results back, they stressed nothing was definite without further genetic testing; it could have been a fluke so don’t stress.

My first pregnancy, I lost the baby naturally. I started spotting at 8 weeks. When we went to the ER, there was no heartbeat, so I was sent home to let nature takes its course and miscarry. Our second pregnancy, I was 10-11 weeks when we had an ultrasound and saw that the embryo stopped developing at 7 weeks but my body did not miscarry it. So, I was wheeled into the OR for my first D&C. We know from the testing that we lost a little girl. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/10/7956.html

Jamie

Jamie Lynn

Mom to Edward Malcolm Joseph October 29, 2013

Baby M #1: 11 weeks, July 2014

Baby M #2: 9 weeks, November 2014

Posterior Urethral Valves (PUV)

Ontario, Canada

 

Three years after marrying my amazing husband Michael, we decided to start a family. After a few months of unsuccessful trying, I had a feeling there had to be something wrong… I called my mom and luckily she knew a fantastic fertility doctor who could see me right away.

It was a pretty quick diagnosis – it only took one ultrasound to discover I have polycystic ovaries. We tried a couple cycles of Clomid and then opted for surgery to get my ovaries to respond. Two months later I was pregnant with our absolutely gorgeous and wonderful little girl, Halina. 

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/03/7633.html

326616_732537945959_100995688_oCarol

Children:
Baby Bitt 1, died September 25, 2013 (8 weeks)
Baby Bitt 2, died April 19, 2014 (12 weeks)

Austin, Texas

From the time I was a little girl, my life goal was to be a mother. I dreamed of being married – but never of the wedding – and of being pregnant and later being a “mommy”. I have always loved children and started babysitting months before I was legally of age. I was soon a favorite babysitter in my neighborhood, with children congregating wherever I was. It was fun to play and care for all of my neighbors, watching them learn and grow. Pushing babies in a stroller, reading bedtime stories, brushing teeth and picking out pajamas, playing games and cooking meals. As a teenager, I loved it as my job, and I longed for the day I would build my own family.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7561.html

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 Sonia

Mom to 6 living children, 8 angels in Heaven

February 2015

 Oxfordshire, UK

My last miscarriage was a shock. I was actively TTC with an 11 day LP and at 11dpo I tested and got a negative pregnancy test. The period started on 1st February 2015 and lasted until 6th February. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7504.html

-MaryEllen

Second pregnancy lost at 16.5 weeks
Third pregnancy lost at 6 weeks
Fourth & Fifth pregnancies lost at 8 weeks

Harrisburg, Pennsylvania

My story, copied from my first blog post:

Med school in our early twenties.

Met shortly after that. Well, his last year and my first in Residency. On a medical mission trip in Costa Rica. Yeah, that’s how God started our life together… years with only a couple hundred miles apart but we had to meet a few thousand miles away.

First kid born full term, we were both 30; he was conceived after two months of “trying.” We’re thankful for fertility.

Human life is a blessing. We learned that in church (Catholic grade school for me, Sunday-school for him) and then again in medical school. When I dissected the hand in Anatomy, I really knew it. Only a divine creator could fathom something so intricately beautiful. And then on those ultrasounds, I really knew it. Finally, when you hold a perfect creation in your arms, it is true. What a gift.

About nine months later, we were pregnant for the second time. Miscarried at 16.5 week, baby number 2 had Trisomy 18. A blessing in disguise, they said. Better to lose her now, than later.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7379.html

Stacy

Stacy

Mom to Ryley, Timothy and Daniel

March 3, 2004, May 5, 2012 and May 18, 2013

Alvin, TX

You never think your life will end up with your babies dying. I never thought as a kid/teen, that it would end with me losing babies. It is just something that you don’t even think happens. Until it happens. Then it feels like it is going to kill you. I didn’t even know the depth and grief of miscarriage until I had Ryley. It hit me like a ton of bricks.

 

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7304.html

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Kylie

Waipahu, Hawaii

They say that ignorance is bliss. And they are correct. I went off of birth control in July of 2006. I was so excited! I had finally talked my husband into having a baby! I just knew that I’d get pregnant right away and have a bundle of joy in my arms within a year. Eight months later, I finally got that long awaited positive! My excitement could not be contained. I blissfully told everyone I met I was having a baby. And if they didn’t ask, I came up with a reason to tell them. Oh, you like cheeseburgers? Well, I’m pregnant!

My doctor wouldn’t see anyone before their ninth week so I took the first available appointment after that, making my first appointment scheduled for 11 weeks. My husband had to work that day but that was ok. I would bring him a picture of our amazing little one. I talked excitedly all through the ultrasound. My ignorant bliss blocking my ability to see that the ultrasound technician wasn’t excited. She listened to me tell her how excited I was. How much I wanted a son. How I’d already picked out names. How I couldn’t wait to start showing. Bliss. Ignorant bliss. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7275.html

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Amber

My angels:
December 29th 2009 – Loss at 12 weeks
May 19th 2010 – Loss at 7 weeks
August 8th 2010 – Loss at 8 weeks
May 1st 2012- Loss at 9 weeks

Oshawa, Ontario Canada

This is the letter I wrote to our 4th angel baby.

Three weeks ago [at time of writing] I took a deep breath and I peed on a stick. Before I could blink or even process a thought, I saw those two lines appear. My heart stopped, my heart skipped a beat, I started to shake and take deep breaths. I looked across the room at my beautiful little girl as she played in the dining room. I looked back at myself in the mirror and saw the tears streaming down my face.

I was in absolute shock. How could this be? A natural pregnancy!? The last time we conceived naturally was in November 2009. Back then Miscarriage was just something we had heard of, but didn’t know just how common it was. Nor did we ever think it would happen to us. We faced our biggest fear on my husbands 25th birthday in 2009, at the end of December just after our 12th week of pregnancy. I miss my baby every day and I have never fully recovered from that loss.
[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7136.html

unnamedKatie

Dec 31 2010 – 6 weeks
April 2012 – 5 weeks
14 June 2013 – 7 weeks 4 days
 
Taranaki, New Zealand
Our journey began 9 months before we lost our first pregnancy. We had been trying to get pregnant and when it finally happened we were really happy. I did everything right; I had quit smoking and drinking prior to trying to conceive, I ate lots of leafy greens and fatty fish to give our bubba the best possible start, I exercised and got early nights. At the time we were living in Whakatane, NZ. I had a great job, it paid really well and the opportunities for me to have a successful career were limitless, according to senior managers I was the next best thing “miss 110%” was my nickname. I was doing everything right in my career and my pregnancy, life was perfect.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7084.html

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Samantha

Mom to 4 lost little ones

Larkspur Due July 27th 2012, Lost January 6th 2012

Snowdrop Due January 13th 2013, Lost May 13th (Mother’s day) 2012 [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/6873.html

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Erica

Mom to Nathan Christopher and 5 other angel babies

Pell Lake, Wisconsin

My name is Erica, and I’m 33 years old [at time of writing]. My husband Jeff and I have been married for over 5 years. We have been together since 2006. During our time together, we have suffered six first trimester miscarriages. Our first loss was in 2006, followed by two losses in 2011, two losses in 2012 and our last loss in 2013.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/01/6680.html

Christen

Mom to angel babies
November 11, 2012 (11 weeks)
June 2012 (15 weeks)
November 2013 (9 weeks)

My husband and I became pregnant with our first child when we were only 19.  After having our healthy baby boy (April 2010), we decided to wait a few years until trying for our second.  [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2014/03/6332.html

Adrienne

Mom to multiple losses:

17 week loss in December 2010,

Chemical pregnancy in March 2012,

Missed miscarriage (possible molar pregnancy) in June 2012,

and

Chemical pregnancy in October 2012

Oklahoma City, Oklahoma

My journey began in August of 2010 when I found out I was pregnant after just six months of trying. I was stunned that it happened so easily and quickly. We didn’t chart, take my temperature or use any Ovulation Predictor Kits. I simply went off birth control, relaxed, had fun and it happened! My husband and I were so excited. I was already 8 weeks along when I found out, because I’d had some spotting that I thought was my period. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2012/10/6133.html

Jeri

Mom to 1st miscarriage, June 2011 at 6 weeks

and

Madilyn Jo, miscarried in 2012 at 10 weeks

Olathe, Kansas

In June 2011, we found out I was pregnant. I had an array of mixed emotions. We had a full apartment with my 2 kids, ages 12 and 14 at the time, we had just had a baby in December 2010, and my fiancé’s daughter was living with us, who was pregnant and due in October. Being I just had a baby in December and was still breastfeeding, I hadn’t had a menstrual cycle yet, so my doctor wanted an ultrasound to see how far along I was and to find my due date. We had our first ultrasound and all those mixed emotions went away…there was our baby-to-be, right there on the screen. At that point, I knew we’d be ok; everything would work out. The technician put me about 4 weeks gestation, and really too soon to confirm a due date, so my doctor ordered another ultrasound for two weeks out to look for growth and an approximate due date then. We left and became so excited about our news, and immedately started telling family and friends. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2012/10/6066.html

Nicole

Mom to three angels:
Miscarriage #1 October 28, 2011 at 11 weeks 2 days,

Miscarriage #2 June 25, 2012 at 4 weeks 3 days

and

Miscarriage #3 August 24, 2012 at 7 weeks 3 days

Rives Junction, Michigan

It was September 7, 2011 and I remember feeling sick, tired, and emotional.  I told my husband I knew I was pregnant, so when I took the test the next morning I was not shocked to see two pink lines staring back at me.  I tested the next several days and watched the line darken, which was very reassuring.  At the time I was 21 years old, a newlywed, and my first pregnancy had gone so smoothly. I was on Cloud 9, and seeing those two beautiful pink lines meant nothing less to me than bringing a baby home from the hospital in eight or nine months. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2012/10/6028.html

Hazel Marie

Mom to Kayden Raileigh

Lost January 31, 2012 at 13 weeks’ gestation

and

An angel baby
Lost October 18, 2012 at 10 weeks’ gestation

Rocky Mount, Virginia

Around mid-November 2011, I had started getting very nauseated day by day, and wondered constantly if I was in-fact pregnant with my second child. After about a month of testing and getting nothing but negative pregnancy tests, I finally got a positive. My husband and I were so happy to be having another little one. Around the time I had found out, it was about Christmas, so my primary doctor’s office was closed and getting plowed with tons of snow. They couldn’t get me scheduled in until about mid-January to get me checked and confirmed for my pregnancy, and to check how far along I was. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2012/10/5981.html

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