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Jackie

Mom to Luke Patrick

January 27, 2017

Ontario, Canada

When I was ten weeks pregnant, I began to bleed. I didn’t know what to do, so I went to the ER. I happen to be an Emergency Room RN, and I trust my co-workers with my life, so where else would I go but my ER. That was how most people found out I was pregnant. Not the most ideal way to tell people, but nothing about my pregnancy was ideal. Luke’s heart beat was 170 bpm at 10 weeks, they had no explanation for the bleeding and he continued to thrive. I had many trips planned before I found out I was pregnant, so Luke traveled to Las Vegas twice, Wisconsin and Hawaii all within the first 3 months he was conceived.

I had horrible morning sickness all the way up to 20 weeks of pregnancy. Even up to the point of delivering Luke, I was throwing up. And the heartburn. I never knew heartburn could cause you to throw up until being pregnant. I was also having horrible rib pain. We were sent to a perinatologist after they found Luke’s kidney was slightly enlarged. They told us he had cyst on the back of his neck, and his kidney was measuring 4.5 and it should be less than 4. They asked to perform an amniocentesis. I refused. No matter what was wrong, I was going to have Luke, and I was going to love him regardless. They did blood tests, eventually everything came back negative on the genetic aspect. Scheduled an echo, all came back good. We were told that they would have more information at 30 weeks, and that appointment was scheduled.

I went in for my scheduled OB appointment at 27 weeks. I was miserable. My ribs were killing me. I had to pee literally every 15 minutes. My OB offered to take me off work but I wanted to keep working for a few more weeks. That night, I lost part of my mucous plug. Researched it online and saw a lot of people had this happen, it could be normal. I wasn’t able to sleep much that night, woke up at 7 am with period-like cramps. Took some Tylenol, was able to sleep for 3 hours. My friends urged me to call my OB. I told you, I am a nurse. I am stubborn. I didn’t want to go in. My OB told me to go to the hospital to get checked for peace of mind. I went, all the while thinking it was overkill. The nurses told me I was having contractions. They checked my cervix (ow) and did an AFP test. My cervix was closed, however the AFP test came back positive. A positive did not mean I was going to go into labor, but a negative test tells them that there is a 99% chance I would not go into labor for the next 2 weeks. The doctor checked my cervix then (double ow) and I was still closed. Ordered an ultrasound, my cervix was still long, however she wanted to keep me overnight. They gave me Terbutaline twice, and started me on Procardia to try to stop the contractions. In the morning, she checked me again (with the promise I could go home if it was closed) and I was still closed. Sent home on modified bedrest.

Fast forward to one week (exactly) later, I went to the restroom, on the toilet paper, bright red blood. Refusing to want to go to the hospital, I waited an hour. I wanted to stay home however I called my OB and she asked me to come in. I really, REALLY did not want to go in. The cervix checks were so painful. Thinking of Luke’s well-being, I went in. They checked my cervix (yippee) and I was 1-2 cm dilated. I was 28 weeks and 3 days. I couldn’t possibly be in labor. But I was. I was placed on strict bedrest. I put people on bedpans. I did not go on bedpans. I already told you I was going pee every 15 minutes. I’m not exaggerating. I was that annoying patient on the call light, even though I was trying to wait as long as I could. My OB told me I would be in the hospital for weeks. I cried. I couldn’t sleep in hospitals. I was placed on Magnesium. I was awake all night. At 6:45 am I had to pee so bad, but it was almost shift change so I decided to wait until my nurse came in. At 7:15 the OB and my nurse came in. He asked me if I was ok, I told him I had a lot of pressure and I really needed the bedpan. He explained that my baby was breech in the ultrasound from last night and he needed to check to make sure a foot was not coming out. Then, of course, the dreadful cervix check. I was 6 cm. He told me (while I was in shock) that they needed to do a c-section right away. I had sent my family home, I was alone. I couldn’t have Luke by myself. I was able to get ahold of my boyfriend and my mom, they were already prepping me. It was surreal from that moment. I couldn’t have Luke. The nursery wasn’t ready.  He wasn’t done cooking.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2017/03/8427.html

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Samone

Mom to triplets Jax, Stella and Beck

Dallas, Texas

May 2, 2015

When we found out we were having multiples, we were immediately placed at high risk. We picked an MFM (Maternal Fetal Medicine) Doctor and hoped and prayed we would make it to full term with healthy babies. The statistics we against us. They weren’t pretty to look at, so I chose to ignore them.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/07/7818.html

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Judy

Mom to Paisley Lynn

May 23, 2015

Columbus, Ohio

Since day one everyone has told me it would help to talk to someone who has been through what I’ve been through. It will help you to heal and cope, it will give you hope to hear about success after loss. All of that sounds great, but it is easier said than done. It isn’t like people walk around carrying a sign saying I lost my daughter/son. I can’t go to the group meetings suggested by the hospital because I don’t do well in a social setting. I am a very shy and private person. I always have been and most likely always will be. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/06/7788.html

11156169_1582516868690570_5060087854349673861_nRachel

Mom to Tyler Hayes

August 31, 2011 (43 minutes of life)

Pensacola, Florida

(I’m not sure if this is the type of story that you would want to share, but I thought maybe it might help someone.)
What keeps me awake.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/06/7767.html

edith

Edith

Mom to Avalon

Born still December 13, 2012 at 20 weeks gestation

Ann Arbor, Michigan

I’ve always wanted a daughter. I’m the seventh in a line of mothers and daughters, through which the property I own has been passed down. The mothers and daughters in my family are very close, and there was nothing I wanted more than the next girl of our line. My sisters both had little girls as well, and my mother was rooting for a girl from the start. I used a sperm donor to conceive, and got pregnant on the fourth try. I was one week away from my 19 week anatomy scan when I suddenly began to bleed. I was hospitalized with a suspected partial placental abruption, but luckily the baby was ok and my cervix was closed, although on the thin side. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7413.html

unnamedRachel

Mother to Sarah

November 12, 2009 – November 15, 2009

Grove City, Pennsylvania

Sarah Elisabeth was born on November 12, 2009. She weighed 6 pounds, 9 ½ ounces and was 19 ¼ inches long. She had black curly hair and dark blue eyes. She was my first child. My pregnancy journey began on April 7, 2009, when I found out I was pregnant. Much of my pregnancy was normal. I felt sick and needed to eat every few hours. I was so tired I would take naps.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7355.html

paint 3Shannon

Mom to Chase and Cayden

December 22, 2012

Brooklyn, New York

At 20 weeks, December 22, 2012, I lost my twin boys. Two days prior to going into preterm labor, I noticed a nickel-sized discharge with a speck of pink in it. I called my doctor and he let me know that if I saw more blood throughout the day to go to L&D. I knew in my heart that something was not right. I went to L&D that day and was given a pelvic exam, set up on monitors and assured that nothing was wrong and was sent home. Less than 48 hours later, I woke up at 3:30 a.m. to severe lower back pain and 5 bowel movements in 2 hours. My husband and I rushed to the hospital. I noticed that my pain was every 1-2 minutes and that it was probably contractions.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7227.html

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Leigha

Mom to Reagan

September 1, 2013

Tempe, Arizona

My name is Leigha, and I am here to tell you Reagan’s story. I found out I was pregnant in June 2013. I was very scared, and didn’t know what to do. I knew one thing, I wanted this beautiful child. I struggled for months with light bleeding. ER visits galore. They found a large cyst on my one remaining ovary that was growing very rapidly, and gave the cyst a month to shrink. The doctor said if it doesn’t get smaller, surgery was my only option. A month passed by, and the cyst shrunk from 8 cm to 2.4 cm!! I was so relieved, and thanked God so much that I didn’t need surgery. Everything was fine I thought… but it wasn’t.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7163.html

dayna

Dayna

Mom to Eva Lucia

September 19, 2012

Seattle, WA

We became pregnant with Eva in May of 2012, and she was a baby we wanted very much. She was our third baby and third pregnancy. My previous pregnancies had been blessedly uneventful and complication-free, so were completely blindsided when I started bleeding heavily at almost six weeks pregnant. I was devastated, certain I must be having a miscarriage. We went to the ER the next day, and after doing a lot of tests and ultrasounds, they found a strong heartbeat and a growing baby. It was such an unexpected relief! The doctor said that bleeding in early pregnancy is common, usually happens when the placenta implants, and he gave us reason to hope, saying that there was about a 50/50 chance that the bleeding would stop and everything would be fine. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7118.html

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Chanel

Mom to Christopher – July 8, 2008

Michai – April 9, 2014

Aria Vianne – November 1, 2014 – November 2, 2014

Fort Lauderdale, Florida

I was pregnant with my first son in 2008 when my water broke at 16 weeks and I lost him. I was numb to the pain of this miscarriage, mainly because the people around me convinced me that I would get pregnant again and not to worry. It hurt me, but I didn’t allow myself to grieve. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7014.html

facesofloss5Brandy

Mom to Caleb Rex

February 19, 2013

Cartersville, Virginia

It was October when I took a pregnancy test. I remember taking it at work. It was positive and I was like, that’s not possible. My husband and I had just starting trying in September. Being so shocked, I decided to take another one; it too was positive. I couldn’t contain my excitement and just had to tell my husband. I called him at work and he was ecstatic, as I knew he would be. We never imagined getting pregnant so quickly and we also never imagined losing Caleb so quickly. It is still so unreal. This week will be 8 weeks and it feels like yesterday that I was pregnant [at time of writing]. It all seems like a terrible dream.

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7003.html

heather

Heather

Mom to Meredith

June 30, 2014

Saraland, Alabama

After almost 6 years of waiting, of doctor visits, research, tests, treatments, diet changes, and going off treatments, Jason & I finally saw that second line on a pregnancy test. i guess it was just intuition because I really had no reason to think I needed to take a test that day. We amazingly got into my doctor the same day. I was 5 weeks. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/6953.html

kelly

Kelly

Mom to Jack Wyatt

Born and died March 19, 2013

Ann Arbor, Michigan

My first trimester had been pretty rocky – I had a what they called “threatened miscarriages” but after no miscarriage actually happened and my hormone levels kept rising – we were eventually told I had a subchorionic hematoma (or blood clot in the uterus) and to try and stay off my feet as much as possible and hope it cleared up on its own. That was stressful and scary. Around week 12, the ultrasound showed no sign of it! We were overjoyed. Then around week 16, more weird problems. I was having trouble urinating – I would feel like I had to go really bad, but nothing would come out. I went into the hospital and they diagnosed me with a super rare condition called “incarcerated uterus”. What happens is that the uterus gets trapped under the pubic bone as the baby grows, which blocks off the urethra, making it impossible to urinate. They had to keep me in catheters for 3 days (so not fun) – then they tried to physically move it out by hand, but it was excruciatingly painful for me, so my Dr. booked an OR and they gave me a spinal, then popped it out and into place. I could describe how scary and painful this whole ordeal was–but it seems almost trivial now, given what happened six weeks later. This was nothing–Jack was still alive, and that’s what mattered. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/6932.html

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Torie

Mom to Aaron James Brooks

September 28-October 26, 2012

Raleigh, North Carolina

I replay every detail in my head of Aaron’s story over and over again. I lay in bed at night and relive it. I long and ache for my little one.

September 28, 2012 I was scheduled for a 25-week check-up. The doctor’s office was about 30 minutes away. Normally my husband would accompany me on these visits. That morning he was planning to, but we got into a fight. I told him that I would just go alone. Thankfully, though, we made up and he came with me. We left our oldest son with a babysitter, and we were on our way.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/01/6605.html

mary

Mary

Mom to Roger Roy II – Born and Died on August 30, 2012

Mom to Guy David – Born and Died on August 31, 2012

Culver, Indiana

My name is Mary.  My husband and I have been married since June 2009.  We live in a small town in Indiana in the middle of nowhere on a lake.  We decided we wanted to try to start a family in June 2010, so I went off birth control and figured it would ‘just happen’.  No one in my family or his had ever had any problems getting pregnant.  After a little over a year of trying, we decided to start the testing to see if there was anything wrong.  My husband checked out just fine.  I, on the other hand, had too much scar tissue (from abdominal surgeries due to Crohns Disease).  Our only option to have a family was to do IVF.  We were set up with a wonderful reproductive endocrinologist in Indianapolis, IN (we live in a very small town).  We began the cycle in April/May 2012 and it was picture perfect.  We implanted 2 beautiful embryos (as the embryologist called them), and found out on May 24 that we were pregnant.  My HSG numbers were pretty high, so the docs and us were pretty confident that both embryos had implanted and I became sick instantly!  On June 9th, we had our ultrasound to see and hear 2 beautiful beating heartbeats after 2 years of trying to start our family.  We were both ecstatic!  Besides being sick, the pregnancy was going very well. At every ultrasound the boys were doing great and growing at the rate they were supposed do despite how sick I was.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/01/6467.html

Candace

Mom to Scarlett
Born and died September 19, 2012

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Aiden
Born and died September 20, 2012

Fontana, California

I felt like we had been awaiting these babies for over two years; with all the planning and hurdles we had to get through, this was finally going to be the big reward.  We were finally going to have these babies in our arms, only three or four more months to go. Then everything changed and we were in the battle to save our babies lives. We never thought this was the one battle we would lose. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2012/11/6173.html

Dana

Mom to Kaleb Joseph

Born February 20, 2012
Passed February 22, 2012

Baraboo, Wisconsin

My husband and I found out we were pregnant shortly after we were married August 27th. On October 18th, I had gone to the clinic for my yearly PAP. I was told that I would get the results in the mail unless something major was wrong. So that same day at like 4pm, I got a call from the doctor telling me that the blood test had come back and I was 8 weeks pregnant. We were so excited. We set up an ultrasound and my first prenatal checkup. During the ultrasound, the doctor played our baby’s heartbeat on the speaker; it was so amazing to hear. Tears began to build in my eyes as my husband already shed a few. Everything felt so perfect. We told everyone about it, how our child’s heart rate was 176 and strong. So far everything in the pregnancy went great. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2012/11/6158.html

Tia

Mom to Jaron Robert

August 3, 2012 – August 8, 2012

Thunder Bay, Ontario, Canada

Being diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome at the early age of 14 felt like a death sentence, as the possibility of infertility was so high. My husband and I had been married 5 years and together for 13. During that time, we had said if pregnancy happens we will embrace it, but if it doesn’t, then we will embrace that, too…although, deep down I think we both wanted a child so badly and were using the “whatever happens, happens” motto to ease our pain. After 6 years of not using contraception, we became pregnant. It was the happiest day of my life. I came into our bedroom hysterically crying, and my husband thought something was wrong until I showed him the stick. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2012/11/6153.html

Heidi

Mom to Jonah Henry

May 12, 2012 – May 14, 2012

Morgantown, West Virginia

Jonah’s Milk, by Heidi L. Solomon
September 3, 2012

After a long battle with infertility, my husband, Deva, and I were thrilled to be expecting our first child.  We spent our days dreaming about our son to be and happily anticipating his arrival in late August.  I planned to nurse him and greatly looked forward to breastfeeding.

What was a perfect pregnancy ended abruptly at 25 weeks when I went into sudden preterm labor.  Our baby boy, Jonah Henry, was born weighing 2 pounds, 1 ounce, a good size for 25 weeks.  He was immediately whisked away to the NICU.  I felt so helpless – unable to hold or even touch him at first.  Upon his birth, the nurse and lactation consultant got me started with pumping.  They said the best thing I could do for Jonah was to pump breast milk for him, which would be given to him on his second or third day of life.  So I began pumping and I felt so good doing something that could actually help him. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2012/10/6074.html

Melynda

Mom to Alexys

Born and died August 1, 2012 at 22 weeks

Killeen, Texas

I have never wanted anything more than to be a Mom. After several years, it finally happened. It was quite unexpected and the situation not ideal, but I was excited all the same. I had blood tests done for something unrelated but because I’d missed a period (that had happened many times before), and they decided to do a blood test to make sure. That night I got the call saying I was pregnant. I had so many emotions all at once, but was so excited. It was finally happening! I was only 5 weeks. I promised myself I wouldn’t buy anything until after the first trimester. I kept my word. After the second trimester started, I couldn’t wait. Then I realized it was hard without being gender specific. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2012/10/6057.html

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