Shannen

Mom to Asjiah-Fate

September 18, 2012 – October 8, 2012

Toronto, Ontario, Canada

It all started when I was 7months pregnant. I had my 18 week ultrasound done over and over. They kept repeating it, saying they just were not getting clear pictures of baby’s heart. Then I was told I had to go to Mount Sinai hospital to have it done, just because they had better equipment. I was so confused about what was going on. I had 3 previous miscarriages back to back prior to this pregnancy, so was very worried. I asked, “Are you sure that is the only reason, because I’m going to be going alone?” They told me everything was fine. [Read more...]

Tia

Mom to Jaron Robert

August 3, 2012 – August 8, 2012

Thunder Bay, Ontario, Canada

Being diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome at the early age of 14 felt like a death sentence, as the possibility of infertility was so high. My husband and I had been married 5 years and together for 13. During that time, we had said if pregnancy happens we will embrace it, but if it doesn’t, then we will embrace that, too…although, deep down I think we both wanted a child so badly and were using the “whatever happens, happens” motto to ease our pain. After 6 years of not using contraception, we became pregnant. It was the happiest day of my life. I came into our bedroom hysterically crying, and my husband thought something was wrong until I showed him the stick. [Read more...]

Mel

Mom to Henry Lefebvre Bonnell

Born and died September 28, 2012

Montreal, Quebec, Canada

We had our first ultrasound on September 19, 2012 – the day we found out that everything was not OK.

While an ultrasound uses sound vibrations to get an image of babies inside their mummies, these sound waves crashed into the depths of our lives and reverberated throughout the universe in a spiral until it came to a deafening halt on September 28. We’re now trying to pick through the rubble and aftershock.

We had no idea anything had been awry during my pregnancy – no false contractions, bleeding, or anything else – just a regular, easy pregnancy to date that brought us a lot of joy.

During our first ultrasound, we were, at first, elated. It was our first time seeing our child. We found him to be the most beautiful little baby, and we were so proud. [Read more...]

Carrie

Mom to Thing 1
Lost June 21, 2011 at 16 weeks

and

Thing 2
Lost April 16, 2012 at 14 weeks

Melfort, Saskatchewan, Canada

My now-husband, B, works shift work in Alberta. One day in June, 2011, as we were driving down a gravel road, I blurted, “I’m pregnant.” This is the point the truck skidded to a stop and B looked at me. The ‘WTF Did You Say?!??’ look. I explained how I knew and after a dumbfounded silence, he started driving again. We started talking about him leaving a truck up at work, baby furniture, saving money and finding a bigger apartment. We were happy, the baby was flipping around in my belly and we went about our days, not really realizing what was happening in my body. [Read more...]

Nicole

Ectopic pregnancy

September 2009

Dartmouth. Nova Scotia, Canada

 

In 2009, I was 22 and probably the happiest person in the world. I had a wonderful boyfriend, the best family and friends in the world, a great job, and a sweet puppy; life was good.

Anyway…HAPPY…my boyfriend and I had just bought a house, on a lake, by a beautiful beach, just the perfect little place for 2 people starting out! We both had alright jobs, and while we didn’t have any immediate plans for the future we just knew we wanted to be together!! [Read more...]

Ashley

Mom to Connor James

Born still May 19, 2012

Eastern Passage, Nova Scotia, Canada

I remember the day I found out I was pregnant like it was yesterday. It was Friday, September 16th, my parents’ anniversary and I had made myself a doctor’s appointment that afternoon because I hadn’t been able to keep anything in my system. I remember trying to figure out what could be making me so sick, and I finally narrowed it down and thought it was dairy products. Boy, was I wrong! I went to the doctor, told her everything that was going on and she said, “Well, Ashley, I think you actually might be pregnant.” My response of course was, “No way, if I was pregnant I think I would know.” My appointment ended with me going for blood work the following Monday but there was no way on earth I could wait that long. I went home and got a home pregnancy test and there it was: a big, bright plus sign. I was pregnant! My boyfriend, Mark, wasn’t home, so, not thinking, I immediately picked up the phone and called him at work. Our conversation went exactly like this : [Read more...]

Melissa

Mom to four babies

Noah
Born still August 17, 2011

Baby #1 – lost February 2010

Baby #2 – lost September 2010 

and

Baby #4 – lost July 2012

Edmonton, Alberta, Canada

My husband and I got married in July 2008 and didn’t think we were quite ready yet to start trying for kids. We started trying to conceive and got frustrated because we were not getting pregnant right away. I bought an ovulation kit and the 2nd time I used it, we were pregnant in December 2009. We were so excited to see that little word on the stick: “pregnant”. At 11 weeks into the pregnancy, I began to have some spotting and went to my doctor. I was sent for blood tests on 3 days and they determined that I was losing the baby. I decided to have a D&C because I didn’t think I could emotionally handle miscarrying naturally. After the D&C we found out our little one only grew to about 7-8 weeks. The doctor just told us to keep trying and that miscarriages happened more often than we thought. [Read more...]

Lisa

Mom to Finley

Born March 23, 2012 and died March 26, 2012
in Naples, Italy

From Canada, but currently lives in
Winchester, England

My husband and I were married in July 2011 and 2 days later we moved to Italy on a military posting. About 2 weeks after being in Italy is when we found out we were expecting.

There is a British midwife who helps with the care there, but my care was mostly done in an American naval hospital, which is where I would deliver.

I had early scans at 7 and 9 weeks, then the regular scans at 12 and 20 weeks. We had the detailed scans at a private clinic in Naples, as the American hospital did not have machines that would scan in enough detail. At the 20 week scan, it was observed that there was high blood pressure in one of the arteries in the cord, which was giving reduced blood flow to our son. The American doctor was not overly concerned by this. We were told he would likely be small though. I was also told I would be closely monitored and that if at any point they were concerned, I would deliver in an Italian hospital, as they don’t have the facilities to deal with high risk situations in the American one. I went on to have more scans at 24, 28, and 32 weeks. By 32 weeks, although Finley was small (approx. 25th percentile), the pressure problem had corrected itself and they were happy with the consistency of his growth. I was put as low risk. [Read more...]

Gillian

Mom to Carter Cooper Barry

Born sleeping October 20, 2011 at 38 weeks 2 days

Toronto, Ontario, Canada

October 20, 2011.

It was a day like nothing I have ever gone through, or nothing I ever want to go through again.

I woke up on Wednesday, October 19 and got my 3-year old, Jackson, ready for our day. I babysit another child, so I was able to stay home with Jackson, who I still have a hard time separating from. We went to the drop-in at our neighbouring school, where Jackson will attend when he goes next year. I was 38 weeks and 2 days pregnant…I am so busy every day that I noticed movement from the baby mostly in the evening. I went to the drop in and really didn’t feel movement, so when we got home I put the kids down for a nap, and drank a cold glass of milk…nothing, then juice…nothing. I called my doctor and no answer, so I left a message. I called the hospital and they said to come in. The kids woke up and I called the mother of the child I babysit and asked her to come and get her daughter a little early. I had to go to the hospital to see what was going on. [Read more...]

Erin

Mom to River Angel Marshall

Stillborn April 8, 2012

Smith Falls, Ontario, Canada

There is Grief and there is Gratitude.

Life can be so very cruel on occasion. I could list a dozen examples, heck, if I really tried I could probably list a hundred. What would be the point?

My personal tragedy isn’t unique to me, although my experience of it, and how I react to it and how it has changed me is unique.

After months of trying to get pregnant, Jason and I came to terms with the fact that we were unable to conceive without assistance. We contemplated seeking fertility treatments, but in the end we decided that was not the best option for us. We had a few reasons for coming to that decision; mainly there was a financial consideration, and secondarily was the concern about how hormone treatments might affect my already fragile emotional state, given that I suffer from anxiety disorder and depression. [Read more...]

Nicole

Mom to Tristan

Died May 9, 2009

Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada 

On the evening of Mother’s Day 2009, I lost my baby. I was 6 weeks pregnant, and had been trying to have a baby for almost two years. [Read more...]

Katelyn

Mom to Brody Stewart

Born and died March 6, 2012

Hamilton, Ontario, Canada

We got married in August 2011. Eric and I have wanted children for a long time. Just after our wedding, we got pregnant right away. We knew this baby was special, as our pregnancy went problem free. I felt amazing the entire time, and every kick from him was a reminder of how lucky we truly were. Every OB appointment that passed was so exciting, and getting to hear his heartbeat month after month, made us more and more excited to have our little guy at home soon. [Read more...]

Kaitlin

Mom to Jordan
Lost September 9, 2011,

Ectopic pregnancy, September 2009

and

Missed miscarriage, March 2009

Kitchener, Ontario, Canada

My name is Kaitlin and I am 29 years old. I am married to Scott and have a daughter Emma.
I am sharing our journey with you as demonstration of our commitment to this process. Please take the time to understand where we have been and how we got to this place. [Read more...]

Danyelle  

Mother to Emelina Danyelle  

Received her Angel Wings February 21, 2012

Chilliwack, BC Canada

Emelina’s Birth Story

My husband I met in August 2001 and knew shortly that we were meant to be; in 2003 we welcomed our first daughter.

 We decided after almost 6 years to finally start trying for a second child, so in June 2011 we went decided to start trying and on July 2 2011 we found out we were pregnant with our second child. My pregnancy had a few challenges one being morning sickness through the whole thing…as well as this baby decided it did not like me to eat any meat other than chicken. I had back and hip pain that made working a challenge but my whole pregnancy was normal…until February 18… [Read more...]

Angie

Mom to Leia

Born Sleeping on October 6, 2011

Kitchener, Ontario, Canada

My name is Angela. I was born May 14, 1976 in a small northern Ontario town.  I have always had been dreams of being a famous author. I successfully completed a three-year course with The Institute of Children’s Literature. Put my writing on the back burner for so very long. Met my husband Mickey on ICQ in 1996. He was in Texas, I was in Canada.  After many years of traveling back and forth we married in Canada on April 23, 2004. I have been in love with the band Aerosmith for over 20 years, and met 4/5 of the band members in 2010. I have Steven, Joe, Joey and Tom’s signatures tattooed on my back. I also have a cow jumping over the moon on my ankle, Curious George on my breast, a pumpkin on the small of my back, and the most recent, Leia’s footprints with her name under it on my forearm. [Read more...]

Nasha

Mom to Isabella Rose

January 13, 2011 to February 22, 2011

Red Deer, Alberta, Canada

In May of 2010 we found out we were pregnant. We were very excited but also a little scared. We had had 2 miscarriages prior – in November 2002 at 11 weeks and December 2008 at 13 weeks. At the time, we had 2 beautiful and healthy kids, Jake who was 6 and Katelyn who was 4, and we couldn’t wait to share this experience with them. [Read more...]

Jen

Mom to Angel Eternity Stewart

Stillborn on August 11, 2011

Toronto, Ontario, Canada

 

My name is I have hesitated in writing about Angel’s story for a long time now. Not because it isn’t important. In fact, it was probably the most important time of my life to date, and has forever changed me. There are so many things I’d like to be able to articulate about meeting Angel, however I am not sure I can fully describe the feelings in a way that can be understood. The only way to understand this journey is to walk it in your own shoes – and this I do not wish on any other person.

[Read more...]

Stephanie

Mom to Jack Michael Ryan

Stillborn August 15th, 2011

Edmonton, Alberta

Canada

I was 20 years old and on top of the world.  A year prior I had met Jon. He was 5 years older than me had a 13 month old daughter. They had both become my entire world. The reason I wanted to wake up every morning. His daughter lived in New Brunswick and us in Alberta. We hit it off right away, our parents being from the same small community in Newfoundland. I thought I was going to marry him. We moved in with each other 3.5 months after we started our relationship. He treated me like a princess. We began getting very serious, he bought a house and we moved in. That was June 2010. [Read more...]

Cassandra Chekowski

Mom to Breaze Lee Chekowski-Martin

July 11th, 2007 – May 25th, 2008

Edmonton, Alberta

Canada

My daughter is no longer here. She meant the world to me and even more. She was the best thing to ever happen in my life, and when she was taken away from me at 10 and a half months old, a month and a half before she would have been one, my whole world turned into a surreal nightmare, and I lost a part of me that I will never ever get back. [Read more...]

Shella

Mom to Tovin Laurence

October 26th, 2009

Airdrie, Alberta

Canada

May 2009, I confirmed that I was pregnant.  I was so happy because I’ve been wanting to have another baby after waiting for 3yrs.  I had preeclampsia with my first son, born at 7months and only 2lbs 2oz.  I told my Doctor I want to see my ob-gyn for my very delicate pregnancy, she ignored my plea, she told me it’s too early to be referred to specialist, and then she left me waiting for a month and went to her vacation. [Read more...]

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