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Theresa

Mom to Adrienne Rose

November 10, 2013 – November 11, 2013

Glendale, Arizona

If I had to describe child loss using a word, my word would be painful.

And not like I broke my arm and it was painful or my pet passed away and it was painful; this pain is actually quite indescribable. You know when people describe their sadness and say they are “heartbroken,” well let me tell you, the moment I lost my sweet Adrienne, I literally felt my heart break. I felt as if my heart was ripped out of my chest. I felt like I couldn’t breath and I remember asking myself, how am I supposed to live the rest of my life without my child? I questioned my faith, I remember crying to my husband and telling him how sorry I was, and how unfair it was because I wanted her so bad. I loved her.  She had been apart of me, of us for 26 weeks and the only time I ever got to hold her in my arms, was to say goodbye. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/09/8337.html

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Megan

Mom to Angel Baby & Connelly Harding

2013 and February 15, 2016

Louisville, Kentucky

Dear Connelly Harding,

My sweet, sweet boy. This is your story. Some of the details are left out; some are tucked away in my private journal, some we do not know yet. Even though you never took a breathe in this world, your impact continues to live on. I receive messages a few times a week of people your name has reached. Your life may have ended, but your story will continue on. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2016/07/8285.html

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Jo-Anne

Mom to Zia

July 16, 2013

On 19 August, my daughter would have been two years old, but instead of planning a princess themed party and getting frustrated over the terrible two’s, I sit here writing about a baby who now lives only in my heart. Her name is Zia, she is our second child and only daughter. She was stillborn about 4 weeks before her due date making July 16, 2013, her still birthday. She lived for eight months within me; I carried her with immense pride and will always love her dearly.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/08/7861.html

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Crystal

Mom to Benjamin Ray

May 1, 2013

Sterling Heights, Michigan

We lost our son, Benjamin Ray, on May 1st. I was one day shy of being 31 weeks.

Around 28 weeks, I began to notice my son’s change in movement. He had been a very busy baby but then suddenly just wasn’t. I kept trying to tell the doctor, but she told me I was just being a first time mom and overreacting. I called the hospital and they kept telling me it was normal for him to not really move around 29-30 weeks.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/08/7854.html

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Debbie

Mom to Adalynn Grace

November 15, 2013

Princeton, West Virginia

It was November 12, 2013…13 days before my due date. I laid in bed with Matthew watching Adalynn move around in my belly. She liked to kick me as hard as she could whenever I would talk to her, but little did I know, this would be the last time I would feel her move. She wasn’t moving the next morning, though I didn’t worry as this was normal for her, especially since she was getting so cramped in my tummy. So I went about my day, washing her clothes and organizing her things for her arrival. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/06/7764.html

Wendi

Wendi

Mom to Jesse & Joshua

Lebanon, Pennsylvania

June 10, 2010 & February 12, 2013

This story starts before Joshua was conceived. In the late spring/early summer of 2012, one night I had a dream, in this dream my mother asked me (whom I only dreamed of one time prior) if I was pregnant. In this dream Mikey had 4 teeth and was walking up the steps. At that present time Mikey didn’t have that amount of teeth and wasn’t yet walking up the steps. Fast forward a few months in the fall of 2012 Mikey, now had the amount of teeth in my dream and also was walking up the steps. By then I forgot much about the dream, but I wrote it down because it was a particular dream. Only when “my friend” was very short did I suspect that I might be and then also remembered the dream.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/06/7750.html

TheFaceOfFulltermStillbirthSamantha

Mom to Alana

Stillborn October 4, 2013

Katonah, New York

Alana Marie Banerjee was born on October 4th, 2013 at 2:21 a.m. – 6 lbs 8 oz of pure joy for me and her father. At 20 inches long, she was a tall baby, with long skinny legs, slender fingers with perfect miniature nails, and big soft feet with all the requisite toes. She had her father’s nose and ears and eyelashes, my lips and eyebrows, the softest skin I’ve ever felt, and a full head of silky black hair. There was only one thing wrong with this storybook ending; following nine months of a perfectly healthy and blissful pregnancy, our daughter was born dead.

Alana died at 39 weeks 5 days, just two days short of her due date.  Up until the moment the nurse couldn’t find a heartbeat, she’d been healthy and strong.  The doctors had called her fetal monitor read-outs “textbook.”  She’d been active and lively, rolling around in my belly, suffering adorable bouts of in-utero hiccups (often more than once a day) for weeks.  She’d passed every prenatal test with flying colors.  There was never a cause for concern – never a single warning sign.  Until, all of a sudden, she was gone.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/04/7659.html

Jamie

Jamie Lynn

Mom to Edward Malcolm Joseph October 29, 2013

Baby M #1: 11 weeks, July 2014

Baby M #2: 9 weeks, November 2014

Posterior Urethral Valves (PUV)

Ontario, Canada

 

Three years after marrying my amazing husband Michael, we decided to start a family. After a few months of unsuccessful trying, I had a feeling there had to be something wrong… I called my mom and luckily she knew a fantastic fertility doctor who could see me right away.

It was a pretty quick diagnosis – it only took one ultrasound to discover I have polycystic ovaries. We tried a couple cycles of Clomid and then opted for surgery to get my ovaries to respond. Two months later I was pregnant with our absolutely gorgeous and wonderful little girl, Halina. 

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/03/7633.html

326616_732537945959_100995688_oCarol

Children:
Baby Bitt 1, died September 25, 2013 (8 weeks)
Baby Bitt 2, died April 19, 2014 (12 weeks)

Austin, Texas

From the time I was a little girl, my life goal was to be a mother. I dreamed of being married – but never of the wedding – and of being pregnant and later being a “mommy”. I have always loved children and started babysitting months before I was legally of age. I was soon a favorite babysitter in my neighborhood, with children congregating wherever I was. It was fun to play and care for all of my neighbors, watching them learn and grow. Pushing babies in a stroller, reading bedtime stories, brushing teeth and picking out pajamas, playing games and cooking meals. As a teenager, I loved it as my job, and I longed for the day I would build my own family.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7561.html

IMAG0054_1Alyson

Mom to Xavier

July 7, 2013 – August 2, 2013

Stanton, Kentucky

“Well, this sucks.”

That was the actual thought that went through my head as we were driving home from the hospital. Driving home without our baby. Without our little Xavier. I remember thinking to myself, no…that’s not the right emotion. That’s not the proper reaction. Why am I not having the proper reaction to this situation? I hadn’t been having the proper reaction to things all morning. Why do I feel so weird. I later learned that I was in a very deep state of shock and I didn’t fully understand what had happened until I saw my Xavier laying in his casket the day of the funeral.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7390.html

qJessica

Mom to Dylon Ward

Born June 10, 2011
Died May 18, 2013

Centerville, Iowa

It was September 2010 when my husband and I started trying for our third child. We have 2 older children, both boys, and wanted a girl.
On October 1st, 2010 we found out we were pregnant. We were so excited. We found out we were having a boy! Three boys… oh my what a mad house we were going to have! We had a name picked out for him in a couple of hours, Dylon Ward.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7350.html

IMG_1096Vanessa

Mom of Max Michael and Leo William

Born and died July 16, 2013

Boston, Massachusetts

My husband and I found each other when we were both in our late 30’s. We were ready to be married and we were ready to be parents. In the next 14 months (after our honeymoon) when we weren’t yet pregnant, our excitement turned to surprise and then soon to worry. I changed my diet (I’m a registered dietitian so of course this would help, right?) to follow the “fertility diet plan”, reduced my work hours from full to part time, started acupuncture, reduced my caffeine, reduced my physical activity to keep my heart rate under 110… you name it and I did it. My husband too, though all of his tests were fine, started reading about increasing his testosterone with cold showers, more cholesterol from food, etc. Basically, we felt like we had nothing to lose and if there were a chance it could help, why not?
[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7334.html

Screen_Shot_2013-05-23_at_3.23.25_PMCydney

Mom to Baby Johnson

May 5, 2013

Frederick, Colorado

My husband and I had tried to conceive for 11 months before we got to see those two beautiful pink lines on a home pregnancy test. The emotional excitement and relief that we finally got pregnant was probably one of the most amazing experiences I had ever felt in my entire life. Five weeks after we got that positive pregnancy test, our lives turned a completely different direction.
[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7322.html

Morgan

Morgan

Mom to Avery Michele

March 25, 2013

Eureka, California

My name is Morgan, my husband Rick and I met when we were both pretty young, about 13 years ago this February [at time of submission] we worked together at a local grocery store and well that’s, where it all began. I moved on to different jobs, and by Spring of 2004, Rick asked me to Marry him. I of course, said “Yes”. We married July 9th 2005, and bought and moved into our first home shortly their after. Life was going great and we decided we were ready to have a family.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7316.html

Amy (2)

Amy

Mom to William

April 27, 2013

Wichita, KS

My son, William, was stillborn. That is the hardest sentence I have ever said. He was born still at 38 ½ weeks from a true knot in his cord. He was our last child, the final chapter in our family. I have three teenage daughters and a 7 year old son. We wanted one more and tried for several years to have a baby. I had two miscarriages before William. Those two losses made me hesitant to become attached to William in the first half of my pregnancy and now I regret losing those precious months.

 

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7309.html

Stacy

Stacy

Mom to Ryley, Timothy and Daniel

March 3, 2004, May 5, 2012 and May 18, 2013

Alvin, TX

You never think your life will end up with your babies dying. I never thought as a kid/teen, that it would end with me losing babies. It is just something that you don’t even think happens. Until it happens. Then it feels like it is going to kill you. I didn’t even know the depth and grief of miscarriage until I had Ryley. It hit me like a ton of bricks.

 

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7304.html

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Kylie

Waipahu, Hawaii

They say that ignorance is bliss. And they are correct. I went off of birth control in July of 2006. I was so excited! I had finally talked my husband into having a baby! I just knew that I’d get pregnant right away and have a bundle of joy in my arms within a year. Eight months later, I finally got that long awaited positive! My excitement could not be contained. I blissfully told everyone I met I was having a baby. And if they didn’t ask, I came up with a reason to tell them. Oh, you like cheeseburgers? Well, I’m pregnant!

My doctor wouldn’t see anyone before their ninth week so I took the first available appointment after that, making my first appointment scheduled for 11 weeks. My husband had to work that day but that was ok. I would bring him a picture of our amazing little one. I talked excitedly all through the ultrasound. My ignorant bliss blocking my ability to see that the ultrasound technician wasn’t excited. She listened to me tell her how excited I was. How much I wanted a son. How I’d already picked out names. How I couldn’t wait to start showing. Bliss. Ignorant bliss. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7275.html

faceofloss(1)Christina

Mom to an Unexpected Angel

May 27, 2013

Charleston, West Virginia

October 2012- Our second little boy E was born at home, welcomed by Daddy, Mommy, and big brother D who was nearly 2 1/2. We knew this wasn’t the end of our journey, but for now we were happy and planned to have our third baby when E was 3 or 4 years old.

This time, we decided to use FAM as our only method of birth control. Since I didn’t get my period back for 10 months after I had D and had anovulatory cycles (until I completely weaned him a month before E was conceived), I didn’t bother with charting right away.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7248.html

SamieraSamiera

Mom to “Boy”

February 9, 2013

KwaZulu Natal, South Africa

My husband and I had been planning on having a baby since January 2012. After months of trying and trying, I found out through taking a blood test at my local GP that I was about three weeks pregnant in September 2012. My husband and I were overjoyed!!! From then on I took all the necessary precautions, vitamins, etc… At the eight week check-up, we got to see our baby for the first time, this little growing, developing embryo that had already given us so much of joy! It was an emotional experience and I’ll never forget that day.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7092.html

312 HillamnJennifer

Mother to Sydney Jon

July 9, 2013

Murrysville, Pennsylvania

On July 9, 2013, our lives were changed forever. I was 37-weeks pregnant with our second child (I had a miscarriage in March 2011) when I was at the doctor for a “routine” check-up. As the doctor was attempting to listen to the baby’s heartbeat, he looked up at me and said, “I’m sorry. There’s no heartbeat.” They say losing a child is the most devastating thing a person can go through and I must say we agree.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7195.html

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