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Jane

Mom to Nathaniel Edward

May 10, 2015

Brooklyn, New York

 

May 9th was the worst day of my life. I go over that day, the ones that precede it and the ones to follow in my head again and again. Even six weeks after, there hasn’t been a day where I haven’t thought about those days. Each time, I go through trying to save my son over and over, only to realize that I can’t and he isn’t coming back to me. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/08/7847.html

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Mariko

Mom to Hitomi Keimiko

3/26/15 – 6/14/15

Daytona Beach, Florida

My daughter Hitomi was born on 26 March 2015 and she had encephalocele with microcephaly. It’s a very rare birth defect. Basically, before I even knew I was pregnant, when her body was forming, her skull bones didn’t close properly in the back of her head, leaving a small hole. It was covered by skin, so we were lucky there, but her brain cells leaked out of the hole and into the skin and started to overproduce cerebral spinal fluid which stretched the skin to form a large sac behind her head. As she grew, her head growth and brain growth started to fall behind and there were signs of abnormal brain tissue outside the skull, but it looked like all the functioning tissue was sitting inside the skull but just smaller. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/08/7843.html

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Jermetra

Mom to Angel Baby Allen

May 2015

St. Louis, Missouri

May 8th started out as any other day. I stayed in all day. Evening came and I had this painful feeling inside me. I went to the bathroom, and realized I was spotting. I asked myself how could this be, when I had just had a period less than a week ago. I decided, something is not right. So, I took a pregnancy test. Two dark lines. I showed my family the first pregnancy test. My husband and I were shocked. This was exactly what we wanted. I still couldn’t believe this was really happening for us, so I took another pregnancy test. Still, two dark lines. But, I was spotting.  [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/07/7801.html

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Judy

Mom to Paisley Lynn

May 23, 2015

Columbus, Ohio

Since day one everyone has told me it would help to talk to someone who has been through what I’ve been through. It will help you to heal and cope, it will give you hope to hear about success after loss. All of that sounds great, but it is easier said than done. It isn’t like people walk around carrying a sign saying I lost my daughter/son. I can’t go to the group meetings suggested by the hospital because I don’t do well in a social setting. I am a very shy and private person. I always have been and most likely always will be. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/06/7788.html

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Debbie

Mom to Adalynn Grace

November 15, 2013

Princeton, West Virginia

It was November 12, 2013…13 days before my due date. I laid in bed with Matthew watching Adalynn move around in my belly. She liked to kick me as hard as she could whenever I would talk to her, but little did I know, this would be the last time I would feel her move. She wasn’t moving the next morning, though I didn’t worry as this was normal for her, especially since she was getting so cramped in my tummy. So I went about my day, washing her clothes and organizing her things for her arrival. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/06/7764.html

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Emily
Mom to Calvin Michael
3/25/15 – 3/27/15
Dover, NH

My husband and I had wanted a second child for some time.  When we were finally financially secure and healthy in our relationship we began trying.  It took two years but finally a positive pregnancy test!  We were thrilled, and our five year old son was too.  We began planning right away, I did all the “right” things – ate healthy, exercised, and tried to relax.  I had terrible morning sickness for about 18 weeks but otherwise had a perfectly healthy pregnancy.  Everything looked normal, baby was growing just fine.  I wanted to have a vbac and so they did a few extra ultrasounds to be sure our baby was head down, we discovered our baby was going to be big!  I didn’t care.  There was one slight question about me possibly having gestational diabetes, but I began testing at home and being very careful about my diet and exercise.
[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/03/7655.html

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Tori
Mom to Tyson River 3/28/12-3/28/12 stillborn
and Skylar Jones 7/14/14-10/10/14 Complex CHD
New Madrid, Mo

My name is Tori. I am the face of stillborn & CHD Loss. I was expecting our second baby in 2012. Pregnancy was going great. I was 34 wks & 5 days on March 38, 2012 when I wasn’t feeling Tyson moving. Those words “I’m sorry we can’t find a heartbeat” are engraved in my mind. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/03/7629.html

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Amanda
Mom to Benjamin David
October 20, 2014 – November 19, 2014
Lorain, Ohio
When midnight struck, I decided that Ben was sleeping deep enough to lay him in his Arm’s Reach Co-sleeper. He would start out in there every night. But man, he despised not being in my arms! I thought  [my son] Trae was the biggest Momma’s boy, ever. Then, I had Ben lol! Ben slept in his co-sleeper until about 2 or 3 am. I awoke to him fussing, so I put him next to me, laid on my side, and latched him on to eat. And as crappy as it is, I don’t even remember falling asleep. I just did. I never heard another fuss, cry, or anything from Ben that night. He was always so content when sleeping next to me. He had started sleeping so good in the early hours of the morning. Ben was starting to love sleep, almost as much as he loved to eat.
[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7530.html

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Amber

Mom to Wesley, ectopic pregnancy, April 13, 2010

Mom to Bentley, missed miscarriage, August 13, 2014

Lubbock, Texas

We began trying for a baby starting the summer of 2009.  We had been married about 4 1/2 years and I had been on birth control pills our whole marriage.  We were not actively trying at first, mostly just preventing.  I really thought that we would get pregnant right away.  I have never had any problems with my cycle and it has always been very regular and predictable.  Well, month after month went by with no pregnancy.  Most months I would get my hopes and then my period would start.  I could probably name off everyone who got pregnant while we were trying.  It was very hard to hear people say that they got pregnant their first month trying.  March of 2010 my period was late.  I took several pregnancy tests and they were all negative.  I was also having some pains in my ovary.  I looked some stuff up online and got freaked out!  Then my period started, so everything was fine.  I had decided not to stress about getting pregnant and just leave it all in God’s hands. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/6216.html

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Shelby

Mom to Brantley

November 26, 2014

Aberdeen, Idaho

On July 26th, 2014 my fiance and I got married. In August we found out we were expecting. We were beyond happy, we bought tons of gender neutral clothes and blankets. We were supposed to find out what our baby was on December 1st but instead we buried our baby that day. On November 26th I started having these horrible pains, not knowing they were contractions and later that night I started bleeding so we rushed to the hospital and they found the baby’s heartbeat but told me I’d have to deliver him (we found out then that he was a boy) and that sometime after I delivered his heart would stop beating because his lungs weren’t strong enough for him to live. I gave birth to him at 11:45 PM, we named him Brantley, he was perfectly healthy. He weighed 10 oz. And he was 9 1/2 in. Long . We held him all through the night and the next morning, it was the hardest thing handing over our sweet baby to be buried. We love and miss him more than anything. We learned that I suffer from IC (Incompetent Cervix) which means my cervix is weak and can’t take the baby’s weight so it dilates way too early. This will happen with every pregnancy I have but I can have a surgical procedure done which is supposed to hold my cervix shut. If anyone has any questions or just wants to talk, feel free to email me.

Shelby can be reached at shelbykayreynolds@yahoo.com

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7425.html

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Brandi

Mom to Abbi-Claire

Haines City, Florida

I’ll never forget the moment I heard the words…”I’m sorry, your baby’s heart has stopped beating”. How can one sentence shatter my world and rock everything that I found to be steady and true? For the next five to six minutes I felt every emotion there was to feel. I was so incredibly sad, angry, heart broken and a host of others. I immediately held tight to the one I love and begin to pray. That was the only thing I knew to do. I knew that God heard every cry for help and every prayer. Even though I was an emotional train wreck I knew that Gods grace was clinging tightly to me. Through that I began to find comfort. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/brandi.html

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Kylie

Waipahu, Hawaii

They say that ignorance is bliss. And they are correct. I went off of birth control in July of 2006. I was so excited! I had finally talked my husband into having a baby! I just knew that I’d get pregnant right away and have a bundle of joy in my arms within a year. Eight months later, I finally got that long awaited positive! My excitement could not be contained. I blissfully told everyone I met I was having a baby. And if they didn’t ask, I came up with a reason to tell them. Oh, you like cheeseburgers? Well, I’m pregnant!

My doctor wouldn’t see anyone before their ninth week so I took the first available appointment after that, making my first appointment scheduled for 11 weeks. My husband had to work that day but that was ok. I would bring him a picture of our amazing little one. I talked excitedly all through the ultrasound. My ignorant bliss blocking my ability to see that the ultrasound technician wasn’t excited. She listened to me tell her how excited I was. How much I wanted a son. How I’d already picked out names. How I couldn’t wait to start showing. Bliss. Ignorant bliss. [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7275.html

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Elizabeth

Mother to Ruby Josephine

Miscarried April 2010

Parker, Colorado

My husband and I had been married for 10 years and had one son. We suffered through infertility treatments for years and with no success we gave up on another child. I began to focus on building the career I had dreamed of and just as I could see my career on the horizon, we discovered we were pregnant. It seemed typical. People always said, “as soon as you stop trying to get pregnant, it will happen.” Well, it had been two years since we had “stopped” so the pregnancy very unexpected.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7230.html

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Katrina

Mom to Tremayne Lewis Randolph Parker, Jr. “TJ”

March 28, 2014 – May 1, 2014

Millsboro, DE

On March 28, 2014, at 4:34PM, my husband and I became proud parents of a beautiful baby boy, Tremayne Lewis Randolph Parker, Jr affectionately known as TJ. TJ was born 26 weeks premature, through emergency c-section, weighing 1lb 2.69oz. He has delivered at Christiana Hospital and was a patient in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) until he passed away in my arms on the morning of May, 1, 2014.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7218.html

SamieraSamiera

Mom to “Boy”

February 9, 2013

KwaZulu Natal, South Africa

My husband and I had been planning on having a baby since January 2012. After months of trying and trying, I found out through taking a blood test at my local GP that I was about three weeks pregnant in September 2012. My husband and I were overjoyed!!! From then on I took all the necessary precautions, vitamins, etc… At the eight week check-up, we got to see our baby for the first time, this little growing, developing embryo that had already given us so much of joy! It was an emotional experience and I’ll never forget that day.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7092.html

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Leigha

Mom to Reagan

September 1, 2013

Tempe, Arizona

My name is Leigha, and I am here to tell you Reagan’s story. I found out I was pregnant in June 2013. I was very scared, and didn’t know what to do. I knew one thing, I wanted this beautiful child. I struggled for months with light bleeding. ER visits galore. They found a large cyst on my one remaining ovary that was growing very rapidly, and gave the cyst a month to shrink. The doctor said if it doesn’t get smaller, surgery was my only option. A month passed by, and the cyst shrunk from 8 cm to 2.4 cm!! I was so relieved, and thanked God so much that I didn’t need surgery. Everything was fine I thought… but it wasn’t.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7163.html

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Amber

My angels:
December 29th 2009 – Loss at 12 weeks
May 19th 2010 – Loss at 7 weeks
August 8th 2010 – Loss at 8 weeks
May 1st 2012- Loss at 9 weeks

Oshawa, Ontario Canada

This is the letter I wrote to our 4th angel baby.

Three weeks ago [at time of writing] I took a deep breath and I peed on a stick. Before I could blink or even process a thought, I saw those two lines appear. My heart stopped, my heart skipped a beat, I started to shake and take deep breaths. I looked across the room at my beautiful little girl as she played in the dining room. I looked back at myself in the mirror and saw the tears streaming down my face.

I was in absolute shock. How could this be? A natural pregnancy!? The last time we conceived naturally was in November 2009. Back then Miscarriage was just something we had heard of, but didn’t know just how common it was. Nor did we ever think it would happen to us. We faced our biggest fear on my husbands 25th birthday in 2009, at the end of December just after our 12th week of pregnancy. I miss my baby every day and I have never fully recovered from that loss.
[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7136.html

unnamedKatie

Dec 31 2010 – 6 weeks
April 2012 – 5 weeks
14 June 2013 – 7 weeks 4 days
 
Taranaki, New Zealand
Our journey began 9 months before we lost our first pregnancy. We had been trying to get pregnant and when it finally happened we were really happy. I did everything right; I had quit smoking and drinking prior to trying to conceive, I ate lots of leafy greens and fatty fish to give our bubba the best possible start, I exercised and got early nights. At the time we were living in Whakatane, NZ. I had a great job, it paid really well and the opportunities for me to have a successful career were limitless, according to senior managers I was the next best thing “miss 110%” was my nickname. I was doing everything right in my career and my pregnancy, life was perfect.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/7084.html

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Lyndsey

Mom to Baby Smith

Angelversary December 10, 2013

Fort Hood, Texas

Back in 2008 I found out that I was unexpectedly pregnant with twins.  At my 12 week appointment they found out that one of the babies had stopped growing shortly after my 8th week appointment and its heart had stopped.  I was warned that this could lead to a miscarriage of the surviving twin, but nothing happened…no pain…nothing…and I went on to have a healthy little girl who is now four years old. I had lost a baby but I didn’t truly understand miscarriage. It didn’t truly feel like a loss. I went on to also have a healthy pregnancy of a now 1 year old little boy.

My husband just returned from a tour in Afghanistan and we decided to try for baby number 3. I got pregnant almost right away. Things seemed fine.  I had totally different pregnancy symptoms as I had with my other two pregnancies.  The baby was measuring okay at the 8 week appointment/ultrasound.  I, like all pregnant women I’m sure, looked forward to that 12 week “safety” even though I really didn’t comprehend why.  But a couple of days before I reached the “safety” of the 12th week, I started feeling this uncomfortable pressure in what I thought was my kidney area. When I wiped after I urinated, I did see pink on the toilet paper, but everyone told me that it was probably just a UTI and to not worry about it.

[Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/6882.html

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Samantha

Mom to 4 lost little ones

Larkspur Due July 27th 2012, Lost January 6th 2012

Snowdrop Due January 13th 2013, Lost May 13th (Mother’s day) 2012 [Read more…]

http://facesofloss.com/2015/02/6873.html

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