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Elizabeth

Mom to twins: Lucy and Anthony
and Baby Taylor

Miscarried at 13.5 weeks gestation on January 13, 2015 & 4 weeks on June 1, 2015

Gainesville, Florida

No woman at 18 years of age should ever have to mumble the devastating words of “I lost my babies.” Those words should have never had to leave my mouth.  God, however, had other plans. That was my life, a good 6 months of it. This is my story of loss, of hope, and of courage.

It was Thanksgiving break during my senior year of high school. I had just turned 18 years old the previous October, and had a long, bright future planned for myself. I had amazing friends, a surefire scholarship to my dream university, and a great home life in general. Life was good. It couldn’t have been better. 

I discovered in late November of 2014 that I was pregnant. It was so unexpected but nonetheless, I was overjoyed. I was absolutely ecstatic for my impending motherhood and so excited to hear the heartbeat for the first time. No one in my family had a clue I was pregnant; I had made the decision to wait until I’d had my first ultrasound to spread what should have been joyous news.

My first ultrasound rolled around in December. Everything checked out perfect. I discovered I was having twins, and that they appeared to be fraternal. The heartbeats were strong, and all anatomical structures looked perfect for how far along I was. My blood work was also perfect as could be [with] no signs of anything going wrong. I went home that day the happiest woman in the world. Sadly, my joy wouldn’t last much longer.

I awoke the morning of January 13th to terrible cramping in my lower abdomen and very heavy bleeding. I immediately became nervous and took a public transportation bus to the nearest hospital. I had an ultrasound done, as well as blood work. I waited 6 hours for the results, all while freaking out and crying tears of heartbreak. Surely, this couldn’t be happening to me. I’m only 18!

When a doctor finally came in to discuss my results, I knew that what he had to say was not good at all. He proceeded to tell me as nicely as he could that the babies did not have a heartbeat, and that they appeared to have stopped growing at 11 weeks gestation. I was heartbroken; this was so unfair!

After being calmed down by support staff, I was given two options: I could either have a D&C done to remove the fetuses, or I could let nature take its course. I chose the latter. I didn’t want any invasive procedures done to harm my babies, even though they were no longer living.

It took nearly 2 weeks for my body to “do its thing.” What happened during those two weeks is something I never speak of, not even to my family, or amazing, loving fianceè. Losing children is one of the most painful experiences I’ve had to date, and I wouldn’t wish it upon even my most sinister of enemies.

Since losing my twins, I have also lost a pregnancy at 4 weeks. I have joined support groups to help me heal emotionally, and am working every day towards complete healing and gratitude for the time I was given with my 3 miracle babies.

I am currently expecting another baby with my amazing fiancee. I am 7 weeks along and very hopeful for this pregnancy to go smoothly.

You can email Elizabeth at: Talley.addie@gmail.com

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