Mom to Lilyan Cayla

January 6 – January 29, 2012

Picayune, Mississippi

On January 5, 2011 I went to my scheduled doctor’s appointment, which also had a scheduled sonogram (ultrasound). The sonogram technician put the wand on my stomach and her face was a little puzzled and she didn’t say anything to scare me and put me in the room to see the doctor. I used a midwife and after the sonograms, we have to see the doctor who works with them. She was in the room quickly and decided to check to see if I was losing fluid. Sure enough, I was leaking! All that time I thought I was pottying on myself.

The doctor told me to go next door to the hospital, because she was admitting me! I was ecstatic as I was 38 weeks and my baby was coming. One problem, this was the only time that I went to the doctor alone. My house was 30 minutes away from the hospital. I also had our only car. I looked at her puzzled and asked if I had enough time to get to my house, get my husband, and get back up there because this is a moment we had been counting down to. I was supposed to get my induction date and I never thought I was going to deliver my baby girl NOW!

I left the office and I called my husband. He could not believe that “it was time”. I rushed home and gathered our things that I didn’t have together. My husband, my mom, my husband’s mom and I rushed back to the hospital. They put the I.V. in my hand and gave me the fluids and also the pitocin. I think the piticin was a waste of time, kind of. When they gave it to me, they said I either got it now or never. So I told them lets go ahead and get one.

We stayed up all night giggling and joking and cat napping.  On January 6, at 6:34 am I delivered my beautiful baby girl. She was perfect.

We went home 2 days later with a clean bill of health. The first week was perfect.  Lilyan started to sound congested at a week old. She was wheezing.  I called the pediatrician’s office and there was only a nurse practitioner there, but there was a doctor in another area on duty that was willing to see her. He requested that I bring her in as soon as possible. My friend and I brought her to the doctor’s office. He checked her out and said everything was fine. He told me, “You are a mother of 2 other children. Go home, you will know when your baby is sick.” I went home and I bulb syringed her nose and gave her constantly as the doctor’s request.

A few days later, I took her to her 2 week appointment, and the Nurse Practitioner Pediatrician told me she was fine. They did not run any tests on her to check on her.

Eight days after seeing the doctor, on January 29, 2011, I was woken up because my husband got out of bed to use the bathroom. I realized Lilyan was cold. I held her close and covered her up. When my husband came out of the master bathroom, I noticed that my baby was blue and not breathing. I immediately started C.P.R. on her and called 911. By the time I got to her, she was already gone. That was my first day as a grieving mother.

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  1. I’m so sorry for your loss. What a heartbreaking story.

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