Felecia

Mom to Kennedy Aleecia
April 5, 2012 – April 6, 2012

and

Blighted ovum, February 2011

Indianapolis, Indiana

The pregnancy wasn’t planned at the time (it was a future plan my boyfriend and I had), but finding out in December 2011 that it was happening was the greatest thing ever! We found out in March 2012 we were having a little girl (it was a Wednesday, to be exact), and we already agreed to name her Kennedy Aleecia.

Well, that Friday I continued on with my day like normal, but my body felt funny; there was so much pressure down there, but I overlooked it and just thought, “OK, I’m going to go home lay down go to sleep.” I woke up when my boyfriend got off work around 5am…and I was bleeding. We go to the ER. They tell  I’m getting admitted to maturity. We get upstairs, they look and check and tell me my cervix is open and they’re going to do a surgery and tie (vaginal cerclage). Baby is fine (heart rate and everything)…so they do they surgery. I stay there a few more days, and then I’m home. The next day I need to go back, they said I’m fine and sent me home.

Got home the next day and I started having contractions. We went back, they admitted me and started pumping me with magnesium sulfate. A couple days go by, the pain never stops. Things start getting worse. They tell me on April 5th at 20 weeks, “We have to remove the tie or the pressure will rip your cervix.” My heart dropped! They took it out. I lie there all day, in and out of sleep and in pain, hearing her heart beat every hour.

At 11:12, I gave birth to my beautiful daughter. She was, I believe, 9oz. She lived for about three hours. After everyone left, I thought to myself, “OMG, my baby is gone…I pushed and did everything like a regular birth, except I won’t be leaving with a baby.” It was so hard for me to let her go. I felt that I wasn’t going to be able to go on! I had just had a blighted ovum in February 2011!

Now I am going to be having surgery on September 14th to fix the issues so that I can carry a baby. I am so happy, but I am still wishing I had my baby, Kennedy Aleecia Hill, here with me and her father, Allen…my family.

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Comments

  1. Avachino Reeves says:

    Your journey is not done yet, your book is no where complete.

  2. Kizi says:

    My husband and I had been trying to conceive for over 2 years. After months of fertility treatment we found out we were pregnant with triplets. In week 16 my cervix was 19mm, and by week 18 it was 8mm. At week 19 a pessary was inserted to help with the cervix. In week 20 my water broke and baby Sera was in distress. Three days later she passed and I went into labor. During delivery the doctors saw infection and advised us to induce labor for little Nyla and Zeke the next day. That was the hardest most heartbreaking decision we had to make. After 27 hours of labor I held little Zeke and Nyla in my arms for the hour that they were alive. Each day has been a struggle to even get up in the morning. I feel guilty for living and knowing that Zeke and Nyla are gone through a decision that I had to make. I know they were too small at 21 weeks to survive and I know that with the infection I could not have lasted for the 2 weeks extra they needed for any hope of survival. But I still feel as if I killed my babies. I keep trying to replay everything in my mind and wondering what I could have done differently. On Friday it would have been week 27 and I still find myself counting. I am so angry with myself, with my husband, and with God. My faith is gone

  3. Meg Hobaugh says:

    I was exactly at the same stage as you in pregnancy and suffered from the same medical issue – incompetent cervix. I had a little baby girl weighing 9 oz. as well. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.

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