Mom to Naya Jane

July 24, 2011 – September 14, 2011

Nipomo, CA

 Naya was born on July 24. She was a beautiful 7lb, seemingly healthy baby. My husband and I fell in love immediately. The only thing that was a little off was the fact that she had some feeding problems in the hospital and didn’t poop the first couple days. They told us not to worry about it and released us on the 25. We went home and started to get used to our new life. Unfortunately, Naya was still not eating or pooping. We took her to the pediatrician on July 26 and she gave her something to make her poop and told us to follow up with a lactation consultant about the eating. I told her it didn’t seem to be a breast feeding specific issue – Naya wasn’t interested in food at all – but we made the appointment anyway. We saw the lactation consultant on July 27 and she also found it odd that Naya had no interest in eating and encouraged us to go back to the pediatrician the next day. I should mention that during this time, we were forcing her to eat and she was spitting most of it up and still not pooping or peeing. We went back to the pediatrician on the 28th and they told us to increase feedings to every two hours, which we did to no avail. After she threw up every feeding that night, I had enough and we took her to the ER. The ER took an x-ray and thought she had a bowel obstruction, so they wanted to transfer her to a larger hospital in Santa Barbara with a pediatric surgeon on staff. That’s when she started vomiting up bile and, we believe, aspirated some of it into her lungs. After stabilizing her, we got on an ambulance and drove down to Santa Barbara. When we got there, they had a hard time stabilizing her in the ER and rushed her to their PICU. The rest of that day was kind of a daze but they intubated her, stabilized her blood pressure, performed exploratory surgery (and didn’t find a bowel obstruction) and luckily, started her on antibiotics in case she had an infection. I didn’t realize how close we were to losing her that day until a couple days later. Turns out, she was in septic shock and had pneumonia.

Naya spent 10 days in the Santa Barbara hospital until she had to be airlifted to Children’s Hospital in LA. She spent the next few weeks fighting for her life and dealing with further infections, collapsed lungs, numerous pneumothorax, severe chronic lung disease, pulmonary hypertension, chest tubes, unstable blood pressure, kidney issues and a whole myriad of other things that resulted from that nasty e-coli that poisoned her entire body. She fought long and hard and we believed in her and decided that as long as she wanted to fight, we would let her. On September 14, we walked into the hospital to extremely low oxygen saturations and a blood pressure that was continually dropping. We knew that her poor little body was giving up its fight and we decided to end her suffering. We gathered our family and held our precious little girl as they removed the tubing that was keeping her alive. She breathed her last breath in our arms.

There isn’t a day that goes that I don’t think about my sweet little girl and wish that she was here with me. I don’t, however, regret our decision. Living life hooked up to machines was not the kind of life she was meant to lead. Her spirit is now free and not suffering. We still aren’t sure how this all happened as we haven’t gotten autopsy results back yet. Due to the fact that they didn’t find a bowel obstruction or anything wrong with her gut in general we believe that she either had a meconium plug that went undiagnosed or was infected at the hospital with e-coli. We probably will never know for sure.

During our time at the hospital and even after Naya’s death, I blogged about our experience and received overwhelming support and love from people all over the globe. It warms my heart to know that Naya touched so many people in her short little life. She had caused people to rethink their lives and hold their families and friends closer. She has caused people to come together in love rather than hate. That’s more than most people accomplish in a lifetime. If her story helps even one person prevent this from happening to their baby, then it was worth sharing. It may not cure my heartache but it helps. Naya has taught me patience and that I have a choice in life. I can choose to be sad and depressed or I can choose to go on and never take life for granted. To kiss my husband and son as much as I can and tell them how much I love them. To be thankful for the wonderful people there are in this world despite all of the hardships we face. It may not seem like it but we are going to get through this. For Naya.


Jamie blogs at http://notesofnaya.blogspot.com/

You can contact her at myty87@gmail.com

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  1. Jamie, I am so sorry for the loss of your precious Naya. (I love her name.) I cannot imagine your pain. I have said a prayer for you that you would find comfort and hold your daughter again in heaven one day.

  2. andrea travels says:

    I have been following your blog from the very beginning that you posted on babycenter.I read every update and think about you and your family daily…I just want to say this, I admire your courage, strength,and beauty. Naya I am sure would be very proud. You are giving her a voice and telling her story,and in the process possibly saving more lives by bringing awareness……following your story has touched me on a deeper level than I ever thought possible…

  3. I am so sorry for your loss! She is a beautiful little girl! In the months and years to come I hope you can find peace and comfort in your life!

  4. Sweet Jamie,

    Your story moved me to tears. My husband and I lost our beautiful son, Hayden on September 20th… just a few days after you lost your precious Naya. My hope is that they are keeping one another company and can feel our love for them. They have changed us forever.

    Thank you for sharing your story… I hope to be as brave and strong as you are someday.

    Jenn Nowkhah

  5. I’m so sorry about sweet Naya. The hauntings of all the weeks leading up to it are the most painful things. We will see our kids again someday. I can’t wait.

  6. I too lost my son to a similar situation. He would eat but immediately poop, it was terrible… I know I spent 85% of his short life changing him. I asked the nurses and doctors for help too many times to count only to hear “Sorry, Thats not my job”. The hospital we were at didnt have a nursery and I had no help, even when I wasnt allowed out of bed I was expected to care for Dravyn alone. By the time we were released for the second time I was dead on my feet. He also had a latching problem so I was exclusively pumping.. We were sent home on 9-12-11 around 5 p.m. After we were home and situated, I fell asleep holding him, when I woke up he wasnt breathing, he had spit up in his mouth and nose, he passed away in my arms AS I SLEPT not even 2 hours from being discharged. I struggle everyday, I want someone to blame, but who, myself? The hospital? It doesnt help, if anything it makes it more painful, The Dr. that cared for him at the other hospital in our town was a pediatric ICU Surgeon, he had the best of the best.. but it was too late. That Dr. told me he was appalled that he had been sent home. I dont know what to think.. Im still awaiting the autopsy report, but I am scared to get it. Im sorry for my ramble.. my point was to say thank you for sharing and showing your support.. most days it feels like Im dying, but I cant I have a 2 year old son that I have to be here for. I pray someday I can feel the peace you feel.. Thank you so much and I am so so so VERY sorry for you loss. Thoughts, prayers, love, and hugs, Farrah, Darryl, D, and Dray….

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