Meneke

Mom to Deron Mekhi Rountree

Born Born June 11th, 2011 at 10:43pm

Died June 12th, 2011 at 12:08am

Chesapeake, Virginia

On February 14, 2011 I had my first OB/GYN visit to determine if I was pregnant.  I found out I was 6 wks pregnant.  I was told my uterus was bigger then it should be and found out my fibroids had returned.  I didn’t know how to feel at that time cause I never thought I could get pregnant again.  I had  a miscarriage in 2003 due to fibroids and other problems and the Dr told me I wouldn’t be able to have anymore kids. I also wasn’t sure how the father would take it cause when I told him I thought I may be pregnant the first thing he said was we needed to get rid of it. So all of those things consumed my thoughts and I didn’t have time to have joy of being pregnant.  My Dr set an appointment for 2/25/11 for a sonogram to see where the fibroids are and if they would effect my pregnancy.  I went home and had so much to think about, but in the end I decided to keep my baby and go through with the pregnancy.

I went to my appointment on 2/25/11 and found out the fibroids were outside my uterus and shouldn’t cause a problem with my pregnancy. I was 7 wks and 5 days. I could see the baby heartbeat jumping. It was at that moment  that  I cried and knew I was making the right choice in keeping my baby. The Dr told me my due date would be October 8, 2011.  That evening I spoke with the father and he was upset that I was keeping the baby, I decided then and told him regardless of whether he was going to be in our baby life or not that this baby will be loved and taken care of with or without him. I never heard from him again. I decided not to have contact with him and focus on having a healthy baby. My Dr had informed me that due to my age I was considered a high risk pregnancy, so I knew I had to take good care of myself for the baby.

On  3/1/11 at 10:45pm I had spotting and passed a blood clot. I thought oh God please don’t let me loose this baby.  That next day I called the Dr and was seen right away. She told me that she saw little bleeding but it was normal and that my cervix was still closed.  She told me to rest and take it easy.

On 3/6/11 I was at church and had another bleeding episode but this was different I could actually feel a leakage. Went to the restroom and saw blood. I was placed in a chair with my feet up and called my Dr. She told me to go home and lay down and prop my legs and feet up and just rest. When I got home I used the bathroom and passed a blood clot. I got back in bed  and rested and the bleeding stopped.  3/11/11 4:55am I had bleeding and passed a small blood clot. The Dr told me I would have some bleeding with the fibroids.  I felt it wasn’t normal to have bleeding, but trusted my Dr.  3/14/11 I went for my 4wk check-up and had an ultrasound I was 10 wks.  3/18/11 5:15am had another  episode of bleeding and passing blood clots. Got back in bed and rested till it was time to get ready for work.  3/26/11 had bleeding & spotting but passed no blood clots.  On 3/28/11 at 12 weeks  I  had  an appointment for Advanced Maternal Age testing to learn about test for Birth Defects(Down Syndrome, etc.)  I decided on a new test called CVS. As the Dr was preparing to do the CVS test he was looking at the ultrasound and said that he couldn’t do the test cause the baby was in the way of the placenta and he couldn’t get to the placenta safely .  For some reason that didn’t sit well with me cause I could look at his and the nurses faces  and felt they saw something but just wasn’t saying. The Dr rescheduled me to come back on 5/9/11 for an Amniocentesis, which scared me cause I had heard so many stories about that test.

4/9/11 Had blood in my urine and spotting.  4/11/11 Had 4 wk check-up, I was 14wks, Dr saw blood in my urine.  She said fibroids cause the bleeding & spotting.  I decided that I didn’t want to do the Amniocentesis on 5/9/11. I explained to my Dr that I heard bad things about it and I was putting it in God’s hands and I will keep my child regardless if something is wrong with him or her.  So she told me it was my choice and would cancel the appointment  and have me come see her on 5/9/11 for an appointment. She had blood drawn  for testing  for birth defects.

5/9/11 Had Dr Appointment, baby was doing good, I was 18 weeks.  Later that evening I was fixing something to eat & had a feeling of something dropping down in my stomach, then I felt leakage & looked down & saw blood coming down my legs.  I was rushed to the hospital.  The Dr did an ultrasound & saw that I had Placenta Previa, I was admitted into the hospital.  She told me the Placenta had moved away from the baby and was laying low over the cervix, but my cervix was still closed & the baby heart rate was good. The Dr explained that some babies survive with Placenta Previa & some don’t.   I thought  to myself my baby is a fighter, he or she will survive.  As I lay in my hospital room I prayed and rested. The next day  5/10/11 I was taken for a full ultrasound which determined I did have Placenta Previa and I found out the sex of the baby.  It’s a Boy, Yea!!  The ultrasound tech said he was a very active baby, he was moving all around during the ultrasound & his heartrate was good.  Later that day I was discharged  & placed on bedrest till my next appointment on  5/17/11 when the Dr will determine if I need to be on further bedrest.

5/17/11  I had my appointment , I was 19 weeks.  An ultrasound was done and the Placenta had moved up a little, now it’s Marginal Previa. Dr saw a little blood on ultrasound. Baby was growing well & developing well.  He was being a little stubborn & wouldn’t move, but the ultrasound tech pushed down on my stomach(which hurt) and shook my stomach(she said it wouldn’t hurt the baby by her doing that) a little and he moved.  He opened his legs and she said it’s a boy which I knew from the hospital ultrasound.  I told her he’s a fighter. The Dr told me she wants me to make it to 28wks cause if he tries to come now he won’t survive. The ultrasound tech said the Placenta should continue to move upwards. The Dr told me I can go back to work but to take it easy.  So I went to work and came home each day and continued bedrest.

5/30/11  21wks pregnant,  5am woke up to bleeding in bed, rushed to bathroom  and passed a small ball size blood clot, called Dr office and on-call Dr called back. He said if bleeding continued to go to hospital. Bleeding stopped & I had light spotting. Continued wearing pads and just got back in bed to rest. After that episode my mother decided to come stay with me to do things around the house to make sure I stayed in bed. At this time I felt I needed to let my son’s  father know what was going on cause things had gotten serious, but I prayed our baby would be ok & not come early. He didn’t answer so I left a message.  He didn’t respond. I decided that I couldn’t worry about him anymore and needed to focus on our son and him getting here healthy and on time.

5/31/2011 4:15am, woke up  to bleeding again, went to restroom had blood in urine and passed blood clot. Rested till time to get ready for work.  Later that evening while at church had heavy leakage and buy the time I got home had heavier bleeding. Called Dr and she said I will have bleeding with the Marginal Previa which is still Placenta Previa. She told me to take it easy and rest and to continue to wear pads cause I never know when I will bleed.  After I got off the phone with her I cried like a baby and prayed to God for my baby.  I felt like the Dr’s couldn’t do anything to help me and my baby was suffering.  6/1/11  Had heavy bleeding when I woke up but as I went through the day at work it got lighter. Once I got home I showered and got in bed and rested and  only had light spotting.  6/3/11 Went to work & went to restroom and passed a blood clot and had blood in my urine.  I thought to myself will this every go away.  It was a ruff day for me. I cried all day, I was so worried about the baby and if the bleeding was effecting him.  Continued bleeding lightly thru 6/4/11.  6/5/11 had no bleeding only spotting.  6/6/11 while at work had no bleeding, so I felt it was a good sign that everything was going to be ok.  By the time I got home that evening I started bleeding and passed blood clot as well as blood in my urine. I continued to pray.

6/7/11  12:20am woke up to blood gushing out running down my leg, passed blood clot, jumped in shower and got back in bed with my legs propped up. I felt something wasn’t right cause I was cramping a little, but I got up when it was time to get ready for work, I continued to have bleeding but went to work anyway.  Got to work at 7am, but wasn’t feeling good.  I had cramps and started to bleed heavier to the point my pad wasn’t holding the blood.  Went to restroom and by 8am an ambulance was called to rush me to the hospital.  When I arrived I was admitted and  told I had severe bleeding, was contracting, & had dialated 1 centimeter.  I prayed God please don’t let my son come it’s to early.  I was given meds to stop the contractions.  It felt like my whole body was shut down and restarted. I wasn’t allowed to eat during this process.  I had an allergic reaction to one of the meds they were gave me, my eyes where blood shot and the right side of my face was bright red.  This concerned the Dr cause they didn’t know what else to give me.  Stayed in hospital till 6/9/11.  I still had light bleeding but was discharged and put on bed rest for 6wks.  An appointment was set up for me to come back on 6/20/11  to get  steroid to help the baby’s lungs to expand so if he tries to come early he can possibly  survive outside the womb.  I prayed to God to step in and take over the situation.  Went home and got in bed.

By that night(6/9/11) at 11:30pm.  Went to bathroom had little blood in my urine, got back in bed & 2 minutes later started cramping bad and with each cramp blood would gush out. Called my mom for help and she got me to the bathroom & I just kept bleeding.  Called the Dr and she told me to go back to the hospital that she was trying to determine if I was hemorraging.  As my mom was helping me up to take me to hospital I passed out and she had to call an ambulance.

At 12:00am 6/10/11 I was rushed back to hospital and was admitted. The Dr did an ultrasound and saw that the placenta had split & the amniotic sac had ruptured.  The Dr told me she was going to contact the affiliated hospital to see if I could be transferred to there high risk unit, but they wouldn’t take me cause I was 22 weeks and 5 days & they only resuscitate babies at 23wks and a quarter.  I was crushed & my heart sanked.  My Dr had a real concerned look on her face like she felt so helpless.  Even the nurse cause she thought they would transfer me.  I thought that was so heartless that they wouldn’t transfer me, but   I kept the faith and continued to pray.  My mother had been there everyday for me since may.  My family tried to call the father but he wouldn’t answer.  I felt so all alone.  I was heavily sedated, given meds to stop contractions, a catherer was put in so I could stay on bed rest. 

My blood count was so low that they had to give me a blood transfusion, I was so weak and at that time I knew they were focusing more on me then the baby, but I still stayed positive. My mom and the nurse told me I was talking out & saying things that got them concerned.  My mom said I was talking to my aunt and uncle who had passed & she thought I was dying. I was so out of it and didn’t know what was going on.  I had thoughts of my aunt and uncle coming to get my son and I told them they couldn’t take him.

6/11/11  That morning the Dr came in to explain all that was going on and told me that I had turned 23 weeks today. I still thought to myself I was one day from 23wks & the other hospital wouldn’t take me.  I started to think somethings wrong & there not telling me.  I tried to stay positive.  The Dr decided she wanted me to get out of bed & move around so that the blood could circulate.  I went to restroom then sat up a little, I had visitors all day, but none where the father.  That hurt so bad him not being there for me & his son.  By 7pm I was having real bad cramps & pain. My Dr was called & she told them to give me meds to stop cramps.  By 9pm it had gotten worse by 10pm I started cramping real bad  & with each cramp blood gushed out.  I called for the nurse, then another nurse & pediatrician came in to talk to me.  I thought what’s going on. The pediatrician explained what could happen if the baby came now at 23wks, blindness, problems with organs, and he could be hospitalized for 4 to 5 months.  I said he’s not coming he’s a fighter.  By 10:15 pm it got worse and blood was coming out more.  More people came in the room and I knew it wasn’t good.  I started to shake and the nurse was holding me trying to calm me, they tried to contact family to be there with me but it was a storm and no one came.  By 10:40pm I was feeling  amounts of pressure & the nurse midwife checked me  & I was 7 to 8 centimeters dialated.  I thought oh God no.  I was waiting for my Dr to come, with all the people that where in the room I knew she wasn’t there yet. 

I knew things were getting serious & I told the nurse I felt pressure like I neede to go to the bathroom. She checked me and could feel the babies head. She then told me if I needed to push to go ahead.  By 10:43pm I was pushing.  The placenta came out first, then my son.  The nurse couldn’t feel a heartbeat.  I was looking at the pediatrician wondering why she didn’t come over to check with her stethoscope or why my Dr wasn’t checking.  But I realized my Dr wasn’t even there during the whole thing, she arrived a few minutes after I delivered.  The midwife checked the baby heartbeat again and it was a faint heartbeat at 80. 

He was put in my arms, I watched as he gasped 6 times for air then bubbles came out his nose and I knew God had come for him. I was so devastated.  His lungs weren’t developed yet. He passed at 12:08am on 6/12/11.  I kept him in the room with me cause I didn’t want them to put him in a corner by himself.  He was 1lb, 3.80zs and 12 inches long.  Being he was a live birth I had to make funeral arrangements and that was the hardest thing to do.  I had a graveside service on 6/20/11.  I didn’t want to cremate him because he was a life that lived. I miss him so much and have had a hard time the pass few months. 

October 8, 2011 was the hardest day for me, that was his due date.  I have a long way to go and it’s so hard.  I’m dealing with people telling me my grieving process should be over, but it will never be over for me, not at this time.

Meneke can be contacted at mrountr@yahoo.com

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Comments

  1. Melissa says:

    Meneke,

    I’m so sorry that Deron is not physically here with you. You are such a strong woman and mom. I pray that God continues to be with you as you continue to go through your grieving process and that you find peace during this difficult time.

    Sincerely,
    Melissa

  2. jamie lea says:

    Meneke, I am so sorry for the loss of your precious Deron. You will never stop loving and missing him, but I hope that you will find joy in the life you have. I have said a prayer for you.

  3. Sharon says:

    What an ordeal you went through with the entire pregnancy. I am so sorry for your loss. I know that grief like this lingers. I think its therapeutic somehow to write it all out here on this site.

  4. I’m so sorry. :( It has been a year for you, how are you doing? I lost my Joshua at 18 weeks. He was born sleeping. Your story made me cry. Everything you went through, I feel more should have been done for you.

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