Mom to Annalyse & “My Little Boy”
Born and Died April 24th, 2011
Forest Hills, New York
My children are no longer with me and I miss them, every moment of every day, I miss them. I ache for them with a deep, soul, ache that cannot be captured in words, or explained. My arms feel the weight of their emptiness. My heart feels the emptiness of this wait.
The lives and deaths of Annalyse and “My Little Boy” are so integrated within my life. Every part of my life is touched by them, and this life chosen for me by God. I miss these children…
It is refreshing, and I take great joy in knowing that I am not alone in this journey. It is a blessing to have been given the gift of a great partner and wonderful family on both sides to travel this way with… and though my heart is full of sadness and my womb an empty vessel, I will praise the Lord for He is timely and He is wise…and I will strive to love Him as He loves me… without question…
I know my Father is loving and I know He desires good for me… I just wish with all of my being it didn’t hurt so terribly much to learn the things He teaches…
I dedicate these verses to Arthur, Alicia, The Quinones Family, and The Gaskin Family:
2 Corinthians 4:16-18
The Message (MSG)
So we’re not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There’s far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can’t see now will last forever.
Nilsa can be contacted at firstname.lastname@example.org