Miscarriage – 2010
My husband and I have two beautiful girls and were not really planning to have any more children. However when I found out that I was pregnant for the third time I was excited as well as very nervous. With my other two since we were planning to have them I was watching my diet, and taking better care of myself. As soon as I figured out I started to make sure I was eating right and taking my vitamins like I should.
I was at about 9-10 weeks when I started to have some bleeding. At first I did not think too much of this since I had some spotting with both my girls. After having bleeding over the weekend I was a little worried, but knew I had an appointment on Monday so I didn’t do anything at that time. At this time I still had all of the morning sickness and everything else that goes along with being pregnant so I did not think too much of it.
When I went to the Dr. and told him about the bleeding he was a little concerned, but didn’t say too much at that time. However I was starting to figure out that something was not right. Then when they wanted to do an ultra sound at 10 weeks I knew there was definitely something that was not right. When the Dr. said there was not viable fetus I did not know what to think. I was somewhat shocked yet not totally surprised by this.
In the weeks to come, I struggled both emotionally and physically with this. Even though I knew the baby was gone I still felt pregnant for a few weeks after this. We had only told a few people that I was pregnant so not many knew what was happening . At first I did not want to tell anyone because I was having such a hard time with this. Then as we told a few people and I started to feel better it became a little easier. I also found out that I was not alone in this, that many people have gone through this.
Through the kind words and my faith I have been able to get through this. There are still times that make it harder then others. For example Thursday (5-5-11} would have been the babies due date. Then today, Mother’s Day, has brought back a flood of emotions and the “what if” question. I know that I am one of the lucky ones because I went through this after having two beautiful girls already. I am not sure if I could have handled this at a different point in my life.