Octavia

Mother to Simon Xavier

November 4th, 2010-March 17th, 2011

Fingerlakes Region, New York

This is my third time trying to type this all out; the first two times I just started crying and couldn’t see enough to type. Somehow, today I’m better.

[Read more...]

Cindy

Mom to Dana

May 19th, 1981

Orange, California

After marrying my high school sweetheart and waiting for our college graduation and his graduation from medical school, we were more than ready to start a family two years after that.  After trying to get pregnant for more than a year, we were thrilled when I found out I would be having a baby the following summer.  Whirlwinds of buying maternity clothes_and outfitting the baby’s room occupied the first few months.  Oh, how happy and excited_we were!  But deep down, I knew something wasn’t quite right.  I had been having cramping since the third month.  And some blood spotting.  My doctor told me that most likely everything was fine.  But it wasn’t.

[Read more...]

Kaci

Mom to Laron Clay

April 16th, 2011

Coalgate, Oklahoma

Our story begins in February 2010.

For as long as I can remember, one of the most important things I have wanted in my life was to be a mom. In February of 2010 I was told at my yearly appointment that in order to get pregnant I would have to get on medication. I accepted this and decided that eventually when we were ready I would get on the medicine and hopefully not have a difficult time getting pregnant. After that appointment I received notice that my pap smear had returned abnormal and I needed to come in for the cells to be checked. I returned to the doctor in May only to discover that the cells were between grades 1 and 2 dysplasia. My doctor informed me that he wanted to remove the cells in order to keep them from becoming cancerous and an appointment was set up for April.

[Read more...]

Tara

Mom to Taylor

Lost at 10 weeks, 1 day on January 2nd, 2011

Ord, Nebraska

My husband and I had decided to start a family.  We were trying to get pregnant when we conceived, so it wasn’t a surprise.  We took a test right away and knew for certain at four weeks.  We didn’t miscarry until 10 weeks and 1 day, so we had 6 whole weeks to get used to the idea and fall in love with our little one.  We found out 13 days before we miscarried that it was not looking good.  I didn’t feel any different.  I still felt pregnant right up until the end.  I didn’t have any tell-tale bleeding, all my pregnancy symptoms were still there, and I really didn’t see it coming.

We had gone in to get an ultrasound picture taken so that we could surprise our parents and tell them we were expecting in a Christmas present.  At that appointment our life turned upside down and our excitement turned into dread.  Our doctor scheduled us for another ultrasound in 10 days.  She was hoping that we had gotten pregnant later than we thought and it was just too soon to see a heartbeat.

Those next 10 days were horrible.  We were torn between hoping for the best and preparing for the bad.  My husband’s attitude was completely positive for the next 10 days while my attitude depended on the day and on which article I had read about our chances.  In 10 days, our worst fear was confirmed.  We were diagnosed with a blighted ovum (a sac had formed, but for genetic reasons a baby never formed) on December 30th.  I was sent home to miscarry on my own. I wasn’t given any options at all.  That may be the part of my care that upsets me the most.  I can’t say that I would have chosen to take a pill or have a D&C, but I still feel I should have had the option.
I miscarried right after New Year’s day, on Jan 2nd in the morning. That day seems like it was yesterday.  I can remember everything about that day.

[Read more...]

Natasha

Mom to Mackenzie

October 11th, 2009-April 19th, 2010

Oceanside, CA

Wow… I can’t believe I survived. Never did I imagine that one year ago I would be spending my last day with Mackenzie. I remember everything as if it happened yesterday yet my memories of her seem like such a thing of the past. Sometimes I feel like it was a dream to have her and that it actually wasn’t real. SIDS is a silent killer. There are no warning signs and there is no explanation for it. I just have hope that one day I will have an explanation as to why my child died from it.

[Read more...]

Kristen

Mom to Heaven Lee

September 30th, 2010

My boyfriend and I weren’t TTC when I became pregnant, but after being diagnosed with endometrosis and ovarian cysts it came as a surprise!

[Read more...]

Michelle

Mom to Karley Jean Homan-Martin

October 16th, 2003

Crestwood, Illinois

I always knew that I wanted to be a mother, a mother of three beautiful healthy children.  My boyfriend and I had an unexpected pregnancy.  I, being only 18 when we found out, was a little nervous at first.  After it settled in and it became more routine to talk about the pregnancy started to be happy about it. 2-23-04 was my due date. [Read more...]

Heather

Mom to Liberty John, Lost at 10 weeks in November 2004

Elijah Lee, Lost at 6 weeks in September 2007

Eden Sky, Lost at 5 weeks in August 2010

and Journey Peace, Lost at 11 weeks in May 2011

Lakeville, Minnesota

Not a day goes by that I don’t think of my babies I could never hold here on earth.  No pictures, no foot prints, no lock of hair to hold onto.  Even when my body would physically heal, my heart would still ache with emptiness.  My baby left my body but never made it to my arms … such a strange sad thing to come to terms with.  [Read more...]

Elvisay

Mom to Baby Boy, Stillborn in the 7th month of pregnancy

and Baby Girl, Stillborn at 26 weeks

Miami, Florida

My name is Elvisay Vazquez, 51 years old, and I have lost two babies in stillbirth.

One happened when I was 25 years old, and  at 7th month pregnancy. His heart stopped and the doctor didn’t say why it happened. Then I changed to another doctor, got pregnant again and had a boy, with a very tough treatment of heparin during 6 months, twice a day and a lot of stress. He was born perfectly, with no problems at all, thanks God!. Now he is 24 years old. [Read more...]

Kaki

Mother to Isla

Born and Died May 17th, 2010

Dear Isla,

Today is your birthday. I wish I could put a pretty dress on you, kiss your delicious cheeks and throw a party for you filled with love from your family and friends. Instead, I will hug your father and try not to fall apart because on the same day you were born last year, you died. [Read more...]

Alisha

First Baby Lost to Ectopic Pregnancy

March 15th, 2011

Chambersburg, PA

I was at least 4 weeks into my pregnancy. I was just starting to notice the early symptoms of pregnancy. Then I started having neck and shoulder pain and abdominal/pelvic pain. This pain would not go away with medicines like tylenol and advil. On early morning of March 15, 2011, I had gotten really nauseated and felt as if I was going to faint. I was in my bathroom the first time I fainted. Then the second time I fainted, I was in my kitchen because I felt nauseated again. I woke up lying on my kitchen floor and what had woken me up is that I vomited. I called my aunt to take me to the ER. [Read more...]

Denise

Miscarriage – 2010

 

My husband and I have two beautiful girls and were not really planning to have any more children.  However when I found out that I was pregnant for the third time I was excited as well as very nervous.  With my other two since we were planning to have them I was watching my diet, and taking better care of myself.  As soon as I figured out I started to make sure I was eating right and taking my vitamins like I should.  [Read more...]

Rebecca

Mom to Baby Boy

November 16th, 2010

My name is Rebecca Lee Carslon, and I am a mother of an Angel.

I found out I was pregnant in August 2010.  My husband and I were really excited right away.  I had my first appointment at 6 weeks, I felt great I was eating well.  Come 8 weeks pregnant I started getting morning sickness, and at 8 weeks and 1 day along, we got our first ultrasound, the baby was moving a lot, couldn’t keep still for the life of him, it looked so amazing and beautiful, with the heart beats per minute being in the 170s. [Read more...]

Erin

Mom to Baby Able

Lost to Miscarriage December 2010

Davenport, Iowa

Let me say that first… I can’t believe that I am telling my story. For some reason I thought I would always keep it to myself and hide it away in my memory only for myself. But after reading all the stories of HOPE on the Faces of Loss Website, I thought it was time to share my story in hopes that I can help a woman get through what I have to say has been the hardest thing I have ever had to get through in all my life. With that being said… here you go. [Read more...]

Shaina

Mom to Silas Max

March 8th, 2011

Petaluma, California

My husband and I were just ecstatic to find out I was pregnant, surprised, but very very happy.  I had an incredibly easy pregnancy in comparison to other women.  No morning sickness, leg cramps, weird food cravings or aversions.  I definitely got very fatigued in the early months and late months of pregnancy, but that was it.  Women told me the last couple of months were the worst, but those were my favorite because I got to feel without a doubt my little boy, Silas, kicking around and dancing in my belly everyday.  He also had hiccups on a pretty regular basis.  On most days, I sang to Silas, my regular songs were “good night sweetheart” or “you are my sunshine.”  At night, I would read him a story before we went to bed or Nate would make up a fairytale and lay his head on my belly and tell the story to our little boy.  We just couldn’t be happier and we eagerly anticipated the day that he was born. [Read more...]

Michelle

Mother of Jack Damian Wilbee

October 4th, 2010 – March 3rd, 2011

Abbotsford, British Columbia

Canada

My child died suffering, after two months of pain in the ICU.  His name was Jack Damian Wilbee.  He died March 3 2011 just 20 min before he turned five months. [Read more...]

Amy

Lost 8 Children to Miscarriage

From 2001- 2011

Bryant, Indiana

The joy of the Lord has pressed into me the last few days in such a unnatural way.  I went to our appointment yesterday awaiting our ultrasound as a last visual of reality.  Either God had plans to preform a great miracle and answer our prayers or He was organizing a different plan…a better plan then even raising the dead.  The ultrasound showed our sweet baby still floating inside the gestational sac..no life, no heartbeat. [Read more...]

Carrie

Mom to Peanut, Miscarried January 2010

and Blueberry, Miscarried January 31st, 2011

Greensburg, Pennsylvania

Apparently They Didn’t Get the Memo…

Which is odd since the clinic is located in the very same hospital that houses the very same ER that first informed me that my baby had died. [Read more...]

Tia

Mother to two angels

Miscarried April 26th, 2010

and July 26th, 2010

and triplets Cadyn, Adalyn, and Mikayla

Born and lost January 7th, 2011

Burlington, Iowa

My husband and I were high school sweethearts who got married in June 2007 after five years of dating. In 2009, we made the decision to try to start a family. I knew that there may be some difficulties because I had extremely irregular menstrual cycles. I decided to set up a pre-conception visit with an OB-GYN so that I could find out what steps to take to ensure a healthy pregnancy. At the visit, we discussed my concerns about my cycles and I immediately received a referral to a reproductive endocrinologist.

[Read more...]

Heather

Mom to Carter Jay

March 27th, 2009 – May 30th, 2010

I always knew that I wanted to be a mommy, and when I was younger I would dream about what my life would be like. For some reason, I always had my heart set on having three beautiful children. That seemed like the perfect number to me. [Read more...]

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