Mom to Anthony Brian Martinez

Born Still June 27th, 2010 at 32 Weeks Gestation

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

On Friday, June 25 I noticed Anthony wasn’t moving like he usually did, but we were in the middle of a heat wave and I was in my 3rd trimester & had been told it was normal for babies to move less in late pregnancy.

That afternoon we had the nursery painted & finished shopping for the baby shower, by Friday evening my belly began to feel sort of soft but we just thought it was the way he was positioned since we had never felt anything like that in 7 & 1/2months. But on Saturday, June 26 when I woke up I didn’t feel my baby turn over with me so I came downstairs informed my husband that he wasn’t moving and we tried to wake him up. I drank juice and ate some foods that were high in sugar (which would normally wake him up) after 20 minutes of no movement I paged the doctor on call and she had me go straight to labor and delivery for evaluation.

When I arrived I was placed on the fetal heart monitor, the nurse wasn’t able to locate Anthony’s heartbeat so they did an ultrasound and still couldn’t find any fetal heart activity. Therefore, the attending physician came in to repeat the ultrasound and confirm the dreaded news that our baby no longer had a heart beat but they were unable to say what happened to him at that time.

They said the next step would be to induce labor by placing small pills up next to my cervix to start dilation. A few hours later I was moved to labor & delivery. We were told that the whole process could go quick or take up to 2 days since we were “going against nature” with induction @ 30wks. By the 4th tablet & still only 1cm dilated I was frustrated & angry; I just wanted the process to be over with and begged for a c-section. The doctor refused to section me since it could lead to future problems.

My actual OB wasn’t on call that weekend so we had her partner (a woman truly sent from God himself). She saw my pain & frustration and had the epidural placed @ just 1cm (Saturday night) to ensure comfort for me and also ordered additional pain meds & something to help me sleep. I never actually felt any pain since I have a pretty high tolerance but the epidural was an added blessing.

After the 4th tablet & 24 hours of still just 1cm they decided to place a Foley catheter into my cervix to help with further dilation. By that time my father in law and best friend’s mom along with my sister were there with us giving support. To everyone’s surprise that did the trick!! Just 1 hour after the insertion of the catheter I got to 5cm and within 45 min I was fully dilated. As the nurse went to start the IV meds to speed up contractions I turned to my husband and demanded the doctor. I felt my son on his way out…actually I had been pushing for a few minutes alone.

The doctor came in instantly, with the help of my best friend & husband our silent angel was born on Sunday, June 27, 2010 @ 1:34pm. Our little Anthony Brian was perfect & looked so happy and peaceful even smiling; although silent. His cord had been wrapped around his neck & stomach but also constricted right @ his belly button.

The doctor assured us there was nothing we did to cause this tragedy & nothing that could have been done to prevent it or stop it from happening again in the future; although these “accidents”‘ seem to be isolated incidents.

The doctor and nurses at Pennsylvania Hospital were truly amazing and we couldn’t have endured this painful experience without them. They cared for Anthony the same way they would for a breathing, healthy baby. The nurse cleaned him up and allowed us to stay with him as long as we needed/wanted. We spent 5hours with our beautiful angel then allowed the nurse to take him for his pictures and everything else then she brought him back to us.

Everyone there was able to hold & kiss him…as painful as it was to know we would be saying goodbye before we ever said hello we were glad we decided to spend that time with our son. At first, we just wanted the experience to be over with…didn’t want to see him or hold him and definitely didn’t want to plan a funeral or memorial service. But once he was in our arms we couldn’t have imagined it any other way.

We planned his memorial service for July 1 & he is now with his mom mom (my mother) looking down on us.

You can contact Tara at tblake811@gmail.com

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  1. I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine the pain you went through. I will be praying for you and hope you someday get your take home baby.

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